What to do for parents of a hyperactive child: advice from a psychologist. hyperactive child

« perpetual motion machine”, - this is how tired parents, exhausted educators and teachers respond about a hyperactive child. It is he who periodically falls out of the crib in infancy, and at the age of five it is impossible to captivate him an interesting fairy tale or your favorite cartoon for at least 20 minutes. AT primary school All problems are only getting worse. Where does excessive activity in children come from and how to deal with it?

What is hyperactivity?

According to experts, this condition manifests itself in babies in the form of excessive activity, restlessness and a lot of unnecessary movements. Most of all, this behavior is typical for preschoolers, since their nervous system is still too unstable.

Boys suffer from hyperactivity several times more often than girls. Doctors explain this by the fact that they are usually larger than female babies at birth, which is fraught with various injuries. Also, the regions of the brain responsible for regulation and control mature much later in boys.

Currently, the number of children with this violation of the central nervous system increased significantly. The statistics of doctors is disappointing - signs of the disease are observed in about 40% of preschool children and in half of the students primary school. Which, you see, is a lot!

Manifestations of hyperactivity

Overactivity Syndrome has many symptoms. We list the main ones:

• Lack of attention

The kid is not able to concentrate for a long time on one lesson that requires some effort from him: coloring, reading, watching TV, solving examples. It is because of inattention that such children often experience difficulties with their studies.

• Impulsiveness

Hyperactive children are often thoughtless, constantly in a hurry, answering before the question has been asked. It is difficult for them to wait for their turn and plan something in advance. Therefore, relationships with classmates and classmates often deteriorate, and parents attend school with the same frequency as work.

• Excessive mobility

It is almost impossible to catch such a child in complete peace - he either runs, or jumps, or kicks his legs if he was asked to sit on a chair. Also, a hyperactive child can be recognized by the richest facial expressions, shifty eyes and restless fingers. He usually moves skipping, forcing his mother to run after him.

• mood swings

Parents find it difficult to understand emotional state their children. They have unpredictable behavior, and emotional outbursts occur without any obvious reason. The baby can become aggressive and even cruel at one moment, and after a quarter of an hour it is already nice to talk with mommy or peers.

• bad memory

Due to low concentration of attention, impulsive actions and excessive distractibility, children, as a rule, do not remember and absorb information well.

Causes of hyperactivity

The basis of this disease is a minimal brain dysfunction that disrupts the course of mental processes and causes all of the above features in a child. But the provoking factors of such a disorder are:

• The course of pregnancy

Severe toxicosis, high blood pressure, fetal hypoxia, mother's use of alcohol, nicotine or drugs, exposure to toxic substances increase the likelihood of having a hyperactive baby.

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• Unfavorable delivery

Prematurity, prolonged or, conversely, rapid labor, their artificial stimulation, as well as the use of various obstetric aids (in particular, forceps) can lead to hyperactivity.

• genetic predisposition

You should not be surprised if your offspring has a similar disease if you yourself suffered at a young age from impulsive and disinhibited behavior.

How to help a child?

Some adults raising hyperactive kids often lose their temper and lash out at them, despite all the love and care. Other mothers and fathers give up, believing that nothing good will come of their crumbs. Still others are trying to take the baby into a "hedgehog", introducing the most stringent disciplinary measures.

Of course, every overly active child is a bright individual, which means that he needs a special approach. However, knowledge of general psychological characteristics such children allows specialists to give some recommendations that will help you find the key to your offspring.

• Clearly formulate tasks

Due to difficulty with concentration and high distractibility, set specific tasks for the baby. Your phrases should be short, clear, without unnecessary details. Try to avoid overloaded structures.

• Follow the sequence

Never give your hyperactive child multiple orders at once. How often do you tell the kids: “Come on, put away the cars, wash your hands and sit down at the table”? The child will not be able to immediately perceive such a volume of information and, perhaps, will not complete a single task, but will be carried away by something else. Give the following directions as you go.

• Correctly formulate prohibitions

Such children are extremely negative about the word "no", so try not to use it. For example, instead of the categorical taboo "Do not walk in a puddle," say: "Let's better walk along a dry path." And, of course, in any conflict situation try to stay calm.

• Set time limits

Young children generally have little idea of ​​time, so you will need to keep track of your task yourself. If you plan to put the baby to sleep, distract him from the game, call him for dinner, you must warn him in advance: “In five minutes we will have dinner.”

• Direct energy in a "peaceful direction"

To make the child calmer, try to walk with him on fresh air, write him down in a sports club, go to rides more often, ride a bike, skate or play ball. In general, find the kind of activity that will give him sincere pleasure.

• Provide medical treatment

Be sure to seek help from a neurologist, who will not only make the correct diagnosis, but will also be able to choose the right pharmacological drug. Medical statistics say that the effects of drugs are effective in 80% of cases of hyperactivity: behavior improves, self-control increases.

If a restless hurricane child is growing in your family and you do not understand what to do, first of all, try to be patient and know that in no case does he want to annoy you. Do not be afraid to seek qualified support from a neurologist or psychologist, follow their recommendations and our advice. And do not forget that your child is no worse than other children, and also needs your love and understanding. Subject to these conditions, you will be able to grow a collected and calm teenager from a small prankster.

hyperactive child.

Is your child a fidget? He can't sit still even for a minute? All households get tired of communicating with him very quickly, and educators or teachers constantly complain about his behavior? It is possible that you have a hyperactive child.

Hyperactivity symptoms. How does hyperactive behavior manifest itself? A hyperactive child is fussy, he moves a lot, it is difficult for him to sit. Such a child constantly spins in place, may be overly talkative, annoying with his demeanor. Quite often, such children are aggressive, cause a lot of conflicts and disputes, as they have poor control over their impulses and are quite impulsive. Often, a hyperactive baby has poor coordination or lack of muscle control, constantly drops or breaks things, spills liquids; he is rather clumsy. It is difficult for such a child to concentrate his attention, because of which he is constantly distracted. He asks a lot of questions and rarely waits for answers. If such a child is asked a question, he answers quickly, without waiting for the end of the question. He cannot calmly wait for his turn, interferes in other people's conversations, games.

This behavior can be the result of both perceptual and neurological movement disorders, and psychological problems. For example, fearful, irritable, anxious children may come across as hyperactive.

Some researchers suggest that hyperactivity has genetic basis, since often hyperactive children are born in families in which such a diagnosis was made to mom or dad, or another close relative. There are suggestions that such a diagnosis is a consequence of preperitoneal complications, severe pathological childbirth.

The first signs of hyperactivity, as a rule, appear even in the early preschool age. Hyperactivity is more common among boys.
In case of adverse interaction with hyperactive child, such impairments become long-term and may persist until late adolescence. These adolescents are at increased risk of developing antisocial and aggressive behavior, more serious alcohol and drug use, anxiety, more frequent job changes, marital problems, and an increased risk of suicide. Therefore, it is very important to diagnose a child's hyperactivity as early as possible and carry out the necessary series of measures.

Why could this happen?

Complications during pregnancy and childbirth (Rhesus conflict, infectious diseases, intrauterine hypoxia, prolonged or rapid labor); diseases of the child himself (pathology of the heart, encephalitis, meningitis); genetic predisposition; social causes (low-income families, single-parent families).

How to help a child?

Work with such children should be carried out in a complex. It is necessary to involve psychologists, psychotherapists, neuropathologists, teachers and parents.

It is very difficult to name general specific points of assistance.

1. First you need to look very carefully at a hyperactive child and try to fully understand his character, hobbies, habits. No children are the same and no hyperactive children are the same. For each such child, it is necessary to select an individual line of behavior. For example, if a child who causes a lot of trouble to those around him with his hyperactivity has certain abilities, talent, aspirations for some kind of activity, this direction must be actively developed. The child has a hearing, a good voice - send him to sing. He will feel that he can realize himself and will gradually begin to change.

2. Hyperactive children are much more sensitive to praise than others. Find more reasons to praise such a child. He must feel that he is needed and loved.

3. The practice of working with hyperactive children shows that democratic methods of education and harsh methods of education, up to physical punishment, applied separately, do not bring any effect. Prohibitions and remarks should be categorical, but such a child should be offered the possibility of an alternative form of behavior. For example: "You can't draw on the desk, but if you want to draw, let's give you a piece of paper." There should not be too many bans, otherwise they will lose their effectiveness.

4. It is necessary to use tactile contact more often, for example, when the child goes to bed, you need to sit next to him, stroke him, while uttering quiet and affectionate words. This will reduce the child's muscle restlessness and emotional tension and make him less impulsive. Tactile contact can also be used in school conditions: put a hyperactive child at the first desk, and passing through the classroom, the teacher, at the moment when the child begins to be distracted, can put his hand on his shoulder. This includes the child's attention.

5. Fighting the child's impulsiveness, one cannot only act harshly and adamantly. You can not demand an impossible task for him: to be attentive, diligent and at the same time restrained. Such a child simply cannot physically long time listen carefully to the teacher or teacher, sit quietly and restrain your impulses. Do you want such a child to be both attentive and assiduous and restrained? It is necessary to train all these functions gradually and in turn (and not simultaneously!). For example, when training the skill of perseverance, reward the child only for calm behavior, without requiring active attention from him at that moment.

6. Do not suppress the child's need for physical activity, it is better to direct it in the right direction: swimming, athletics, dancing, football.

7. Do not forget that a hyperactive child works easier at the beginning of the day than in the evening, at the beginning of the lesson, and not at the end. Try to find an opportunity for individual lessons, because being alone with an adult, the child does not show signs of hyperactivity and copes with work much more successfully.

8. For a hyperactive child, it is necessary to create the opportunity to share school lesson for several periods. For example, after completing 2-3 tasks, you can play a game with the children, have a physical education session or do gymnastics for the fingers. It is clear that under normal high school, this is very difficult to do. It is necessary, if possible, to find ways of individual learning, in groups with a smaller number of students and with teachers who would understand the problems of a given child.

9. School programs are now very complicated and during the lesson the students have to change their occupation several times. It is more difficult for hyperactive children to switch from one type of activity to another, even if this is required by a teacher or educator. Therefore, a teacher at a school can, a few minutes before the end of the time for completing a task, warn the class: “So many minutes left” or use non-verbal signals, such as a timer signal set for a certain period of time. This will allow the hyperactive child to have time to readjust.

10. Have a hyperactive child write a set of necessary rules or instructions for himself and place it in a conspicuous place. But do not forget that any rule or instruction should be specific and contain no more than ten words. Otherwise, the child will still not hear the adult and will not remember the instructions, and, therefore, will not be able to complete the task. The parent or educator should give clear warning of the consequences of non-compliance with the rules or instructions, but also provide an opportunity to correct unintentional violations of these rules.

11. It is necessary to develop a system of rewards and punishments for such a child. It must be flexible but consistent. Given the child's hyperactivity, rewards should be immediate and repeated after about 15-20 minutes. For example, you can give tokens for correct behavior, and then exchange them for a prize (candy, toy, etc.).

12. One of the main rules of adult behavior in relation to a hyperactive child: in case of any unexpected action of the child (even if it is provocative) - remain calm and cool, no matter how difficult it is. Before reacting to an unpleasant situation, try counting to ten. And by avoiding an emotional outburst, you can better understand the child.

13. Parents of a hyperactive child should not fall into despair when they see the behavior of their child. They should not blame the child or themselves. He is what he is. It is necessary without panic to try to develop a model of behavior with the child, after consulting with teachers, child psychologists. In any case, it is necessary to meet a child from school, not with reproaches, but with tenderness and a smile.

14. Parents should think carefully about all the assignments that they give the child, and remember: the child will do only what he is interested in, and will do this only until he gets bored. As soon as the child is tired, it should be switched to another activity.

15. Workplace the child should be quiet and calm - not near the TV, constantly opening doors. While doing homework it is advisable for parents to be nearby and, if necessary, help a restless son or daughter.

16. If a child is wrong about something, parents should not lecture him, as a long speech will not be fully heard and understood. It is better to establish rules of conduct and a system of rewards and punishments in advance. As noted above, the requirements for the child must be specific, clear and feasible.

17. You can not force a child to ask for forgiveness and make promises.

18. For a hyperactive child, it is necessary to select such exercises and games that would contribute to the development of only one function. For example, games aimed at developing only attention or games that teach a child to control their impulsive actions.

Having done the work on training one weak function and having received the results, you can select games for training two functions at once. As already noted, it is better to start with individual forms of work so that the child can clearly assimilate the requirements of the teacher, and then gradually involve him in collective games. At the same time, you must try to captivate the child, make it interesting for him. When he has the experience of participating in games and exercises aimed at developing two weak functions at once (attention and control of impulsivity, attention and control of motor activity, etc.), you can move on to more complex forms of work on simultaneous (in the same game) working out all three functions.

Most The best way interactions with such a child cooperation. If your kid messed up, talk to him. Try together to determine the reasons for his act. Give the child the opportunity to realize his wrong, ask for forgiveness and develop a further plan of action. This plan will include ways to eliminate the consequences of a “bad” act (if possible). For example, if the child has scattered things or toys around the apartment, then help him develop a cleaning plan, etc. This plan will also include penalties in the event of a repeat relapse. At the same time, you should develop a plan together, and it must be agreed and approved by both you and the child.

A hyperactive child needs recognition of its importance. Show your child how you feel about him as often as possible. Hug him, kiss him, talk about how you love him and how dear he is to you.

When interacting with such a child, it is necessary to remember that it is difficult for him to concentrate on one thing. His interest constantly "jumps" from one object to another, he cannot finish the work he has begun. Therefore, one of your first tasks is the task of teaching the child to complete the work begun. To do this, during any classes, on the one hand, make sure that there is a logical conclusion in each element of the game or action, and on the other hand, watch the child's attention. At the same time, you must be ready to switch after the interests of the child. But be sure to go back to the previous lesson and finish it. For example, you were drawing a picture with your child, and suddenly he jumped up and ran to the window. Come to him, hug him. Consider what is now outside the window. Discuss those points that interested the baby. After the child loses interest in the window, return to the end of the unfinished drawing and be sure to complete it.

A child with such difficulties as hyperactivity must necessarily have the possibility of emotional and physical "relaxation". Such a child simply needs to run, jump, scream and react violently. The task of adults who surround such a crumb is to give him the opportunity for such a discharge without compromising learning and relationships with others. Therefore, make sure that your baby has a place and time for such “unloadings”. This may include more frequent walks, especially before bed or any quiet activity; a personal place in the apartment, which is equipped with all kinds of ladders and slides, or visiting active circles, such as active sports or dancing. At the same time, the main thing is that the child liked and was interested in the activity chosen by you.

He cannot sit quietly on the couch or play for a long time. Everything quickly bothers him, he is quick-tempered and aggressive. You can't leave him alone for a minute. How to deal with an overactive child?

16:20 5.08.2013

While young mothers discussed the benefits of different juices and diapers, Nastya ran after her three-year-old Andryushka throughout the microdistrict. Her tomboy, unlike other kids, peacefully digging in the sandbox, all the time strove to rush off somewhere. He was rushing around like a small comet, categorically not wanting to stay within the playground. When they caught him and tried to return him to his native yard, Andryushka threw such a tantrum that the grandmothers from the neighboring entrances shook their heads disapprovingly and pursed their lips. However, this ability - point-blank not to see the boundaries of what is permitted - remained with him even when he became much older.

So begins the story of most children who are later diagnosed with ADHD - Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. But unlike nimble kids, who school age become more balanced, problems with hyperchildren grow like a snowball.

The fact that such a smart and erudite boy like Andrei could have serious misunderstandings in kindergarten, Nastya could not even think. However, already on the second day, the teachers, groaning and sighing, began vying to talk about the fact that the child is naughty, uncontrollable, capricious, does not eat, does not sleep and does not want to sit in class with other children, and most importantly, is completely unprepared to visit kindergarten .

It was from that moment that all the big troubles of the little man began.

Despite his mobility, Andryushka was very awkward and desperately annoyed his father, who was trying to teach his son to play football or climb trees. The mother-in-law refused to take her grandson for the weekend after Andrei, in a fit of rage, threw a wooden toy into the sideboard, breaking the glass. The grandfather was indignant at the complete lack of purposefulness and perseverance of his grandson. A rare walk was complete without strangers reprimanding Andrey. Reproaches poured in from everywhere. The circle closed, and Nastya constantly felt betrayed by everyone, guilty, tired and desperate. And Andryusha, as luck would have it, as if sensing the nervous situation, became even more quick-tempered and whiny.

The Road to Calvary

The first specialist to whom the exhausted Nastya decided to turn for advice was a psychologist. An important lady said that although she did not see any serious problems, she agreed to work out. However, in the third lesson, she noted that the child was very inattentive and unassembled. Also has advised to descend or go to the neuropathologist. No special deviations, except for motor disinhibition and slight delay speech development, this specialist did not find either. And on issues of behavior recommended to consult with a child psychiatrist.

This time the elderly doctor had a long conversation with Andrey himself. “You have a very smart boy, but, unfortunately, he has some features that need medical correction,” the doctor pronounced his verdict.

Nastya was shocked. But I was afraid to give my child antipsychotics. And I decided to talk to another specialist. And then with one more. It is difficult to say how many offices they had to visit. It was a hard, exhausting pilgrimage in trying to find the answer to just one question: "What about the child?" The more doctors they visited, the more confusing the diagnosis seemed. Medical opinions ranged from "absolutely healthy" to "a very difficult case." Once, during the next appointment, one of the doctors voiced the hitherto unknown cause of all their suffering - ADHD.

Nastya spent the whole night reading information about this syndrome on the Internet. And in the morning I found a forum where mothers of children with similar problems discussed methods of education, treatment, and correction. It seemed that three-quarters of what others were describing was a portrait of her son. Scattered, uncollected, quick-tempered, impulsive, impatient, unable to wait his turn and cannot bear to lose, unable to find mutual language with other children, but at the same time very kind, affectionate and quick-witted.

Cause and effect

It turned out that there are not so few children like Andrey - about 3-5%, of which the majority are boys. And that this is a mild neurological disorder, which is often not detected during a standard examination. And most importantly, most of Nastya's new virtual friends went through a similar path of hopes and disappointments and learned to treat many troubles patiently, wisely, and often even with humor.

Mothers of hyperactive children are constantly faced with misunderstanding and condemnation of others who, indignantly, pay attention to the violent temper of their sons and daughters. In fact, SDVs, as their parents affectionately call them, have their own outstanding qualities. For example, the “double exclusivity effect” is an incredible combination of inattention, fatigue, and other problems that make learning difficult, with general giftedness and even talent. Indeed, Nastya was always surprised by her excellent memory and outstanding mathematical ability son. But, alas, our system of preschool and school education does not take into account these features.

The main problem of children with ADHD in schools and kindergartens is that they are restless and impatient. For them, the word "must" does not exist. They practically fail to keep their attention on things that are not significant to them for more than 5-10 minutes. At the same time, they can spend hours doing what interests them. They talk a lot and get distracted. Sitting quietly in class and writing or counting diligently all the time is an impossible task for them. When they get bored, they start to spin and interfere with the lesson. In addition, due to the later functional maturation of the frontal lobes of the brain, these children are more infantile and impulsive than their peers. Their psychological age is about 30% less than their biological age. Therefore, in everything that concerns the ability to control their emotions and plan actions, a nine-year-old child with ADHD corresponds to a six-year-old.

They sleep less than other children and wake up more often at night. In the motor sphere, they often show violations of coordination, and the development fine motor skills and the formation of skills are late. It is more difficult for them to learn how to tie shoelaces, fasten buttons. Their notebooks are striking in their sloppiness, and the handwriting is simply terrible. Their distraction can drive even the most patient parents and teachers crazy. Such a child can lose his own notebook on his own desk, mix up jackets in the locker room, not find a school uniform and forget his briefcase in the minibus.

However, what is the reason for such problems? The opinions of scientists differed, but most experts tend to think that the basis of this disorder is a violation of voluntary control and energy tone. Because of this, the child is overexcited, restless, and cannot concentrate on anything for a long time. However, he gets tired very quickly. You can not discount the hereditary, genetically determined predisposition to ADHD, which is also confirmed by research.

Despite disputes and different points of view regarding the nature of this syndrome, physicians, teachers and psychologists are unanimous in one thing: the number of such children is growing every year. Therefore, both teachers and parents should pay attention to some rules that can help in communicating and teaching hyperchildren.

Love, Attention, Patience

First of all, it depends on the parents how successfully the son or daughter will be able to overcome their problems. It is unacceptable for a child to become accustomed to considering himself "bad", "disorganized", "intolerable" and to develop an inferiority complex. Despite the fact that after the age of 12, in about half of children, the main symptoms of ADHD subside, the incorrect behavior of parents and teachers can lead to low self-esteem and loss of self-confidence.

You need to understand the most important thing: children with ADHD especially need love and protection! In their lives they experience great amount failures and disappointments and therefore require special treatment. They cannot be punished for inattention (after all, they hear only half of what they are told), “branded” with unpleasant epithets, shouted at them, compared with other children. For them, a clear daily routine is especially important, which should be observed from the first months of life, sports development, a calm atmosphere in the house and the attention of mom and dad. When sending a hyperactive baby to a kindergarten or school, be sure to warn the teacher (teacher) that your child is too mobile and restless: he needs to be helped to organize work, drawing up an effective plan, and allow him to move more often. At home, the child needs to be constantly occupied with something: drawing, designing, sculpting, reading, remembering that any activity quickly bothers him. Parental patience, respectful dialogue with the child and sincere love will help your child believe in himself and overcome the difficulties caused by ADHD over the years.

We bring up a fidget

You need to communicate with a hyperactive child as calmly as possible, repeating a lot several times. Yelling will only make the problem worse.

• Praise and highlight your child's progress, reward for achievements, focusing not on the end result, but on how much effort the baby had to make.
• Install simple rules: do not eat sweets before meals, go to bed no later than nine in the evening - and strictly observe them, without wasting time on arguments.
• Break any large tasks into parts, as it is not uncommon for a hyperactive toddler to back down from serious tasks, fearing, "I'll never be able to finish this."
• Hyperactive children find it very difficult to switch from one activity to another. And if some exciting business needs to be completed by a certain date - warn the child about this in advance and, possibly, more than once.
• Overwork enhances all the negative manifestations of the syndrome. Therefore, any load should be adequate to the capabilities of the child. Fatigue makes children with ADHD even more excitable.
• Do not limit the child's physical activity. At home, such a baby should have a sports corner. With him you need to walk a lot and play sports.

More than 200 years ago, the German physician Heinrich Hoffmann was the first to describe hyperactive child and called him "Fidget Phil". But only in the 60s of the XX century, doctors began to evaluate excessive mobility not as a trait of character, but as an incorrigible mental defect.

A teaspoon per hour

You came home from work in the evening, and your son did not do the simplest: the bed is not made, the sock thrown in the center of the room two days ago is still lying, and everything is strewn with chips. You ask: “Is it really difficult to lift? How are you not ashamed? Why are you torturing me like this?"

These questions are incomprehensible even for an ordinary child, and the consciousness of a hyperactive one passes them through like a colander water. Only specifics catch him - it’s better to start right from the sock without unnecessary emotions.

Do not offer large-scale plans like cleaning an apartment to a hyperactive child. Gets scared too big task. His ability to concentrate on one thing is limited. So what, let him wash a teaspoon per hour, says Dr. Martin. The main thing is that you have the patience to give these "spoons" regularly, load and not be annoyed that your fast baby makes everything so slow.

I don't live by order!

– Get ready, please! We have to leave in five minutes! - the mother addresses her eleven-year-old daughter. She continues to do her own thing, because, firstly, for her there are no “we”, there is only “I”, and secondly, the word “should” is too vague. She begins to torment her mother with questions: “Why exactly in five minutes, and not in six?”, “Who should?”. And this is just the beginning of a long, pointless discussion. Do you want your child to start gathering? Interest him: “Can you pack things in three and a half minutes?”.

It is very important that the task sound in the form of a question, not an order. And then the result will not keep you waiting.

Soundless

If you want to be heard, whisper. The louder we shout, swear, the more likely they will turn us off. Hyperactive children are capable of this "switch-off" like no other. During periods of great showdown, we look to them like fish, silently opening their mouths. Such is their protection from parental emotions. But as soon as you begin to whisper, they will begin to listen. And then your word will be worth its weight in gold. Sometimes it is useful to communicate without words at all, a “traffic light” system has even been developed for young children, where red is a sign of prohibition, yellow is alarm, and green is permission. Hyperactive children are much more sensitive to pictures than to verbal information.

Interrogation not needed

The worst thing that can be demanded during a conversation with a daughter or son is: “Look me straight in the eyes!”. Dr. Martin teaches parents not to look for eye contact and to allow the child to turn something in his hands during the conversation - a pencil, a toy, a handkerchief ... "Manual employment" increases his ability to concentrate. But if he stands up straight and looks into your eyes, all his strength will be spent on maintaining this stance. And the meaning of the words will fly by.

By themselves

The teenage son came home from school irritated, it was a bad day. To the question: "What happened?" replies, "None of your business!" Parents can explode and punish, they can sympathize. But experts advise: it is better to stay in your mood. Read a magazine, watch TV, cook dinner - keep doing it.

If the child feels that the adult is not irritated, he calms down. The ideal parents for hyperactive children are those who are able to maintain a stone calmness in any situation. There are few of them, usually in hyperactive children, parents themselves quickly become irritable. And then the question arises: who is educating whom here?

incomprehensible word

A twelve-year-old girl has been torturing her mother for the third hour in various variations:

“Well, why can’t you bring a couple of white rats into the house, why?

The mother asks in despair:

- You don't understand the word "no"?

The girl frankly admits:

- I do not understand.

And it is true. Ordinary child the ban will upset, but he will quickly outlive it. For a hyperactive "no" - a small catastrophe, an excuse to put adults under siege, by any means to force them to change "no" to "yes".

Psychologists, working with hyperactive children, use the following reward system: the best prize goes to those who could, if not the first, but at least the second time, accept “no” without disputes. In addition to rewards, there is also punishment, for example, the child should write on paper five or ten times: “I will try to accept the refusal calmly.” They say that this measure is very effective.

Inequality

Hyperactive kids need to know that there is a Boss in their house. As soon as they notice that the boss is not there, they immediately take his place.

It is very difficult for single mothers to cope with a son-boss or daughter-boss. Children begin to correct: “You don’t cook like that,” or even evaluate: “You’re raising me wrong!” This brings parents to tears.

One father, having come home from work, and after listening to his 15-year-old son, who did not comply with any of his requests (because “it was all stupid”), said: “If you argued with the boss at work like that, you would just be fired right away” . From his son's eyes, he realized that the young man was surprised, afraid for the future, and therefore, without further reminders, he went to take out the trash.

War and Peace

When a parent just opens their mouth to talk to the child, he must know what he wants - war or peace. Hyperactive people always have something to scold for, so there is a reason for war. But if you want peace, you must first bring yourself to your senses. Before educational conversation it is worth sitting in a chair, and throwing your legs on the table - from this position it is more difficult to press and shout. Our peace of mind is just what a hyperactive child needs. Only it helps him, protects, gives confidence.

“I will surprise you yet,” says the thirteen-year-old son, who has hundreds of undertakings in his plans and not one has yet been brought even to the middle. But you have to believe and not tell him too much.

In this article:

A hyperactive child is the name given to children who do not sit still for a minute. What should parents do in such cases, what advice can be given on raising restless kids? Perhaps you need to get advice from a psychologist on this issue?

If we consider the concept of hyperactivity from a medical point of view, then this condition does not require medical intervention. If you have a hyperactive baby, then only tips will help in raising him experienced psychologist. He will tell you how to properly direct, and not destroy or extinguish this bundle of energy. Because this condition, manifested in early preschool age, in the absence of the correct guiding vector, will cause great trouble in elementary school and later in high school. It can negatively affect relationships with children and teachers and form an inferiority complex. Therefore, it is better for parents not to hesitate and follow the recommendations of a specialist.

How to recognize a hyperactive child

The main signs of the presence of hyperactivity are spontaneous reactions that the child cannot suppress on his own. They negatively affect the speech, attention, mobility of the crumbs. Everyone around calls this lively guy overly emotional.

Also, the negative manifestations of hyperactivity include:

In practice, this manifests itself in next steps. For a hyperactive baby, it is sheer torture to stand in line or listen, sitting in one place, to a caregiver or teacher. An overactive toddler moves a lot, when answering questions collectively, he always interrupts others and strives to be the first to speak, does not remember instructions well and, as a result, does not fulfill them or performs them poorly.

Because of the buoyant energy, such children cannot concentrate their attention on something for a long time, and therefore they are often not diligent students, leaving the work unfinished. They cannot listen to the question to the end, often answer inappropriately, do not think about the answer. They also throw tantrums for no reason or show anger at the wrong time. They cannot understand other people's needs and delve into the desires of other people, coordinating them with their own.

Signs of a hyperactive child can be noticed before the age of seven. At preschool age, it is easier to start coping with this problem. You need to understand that overactive children cannot cope with their conditions on their own, and therefore parents need to help them.

Hyperactive kids require more attention and participation in their lives than more balanced and calm ones. But parents need
remember that their efforts spent on raising a little one will then pay off handsomely. And they will become an example for their child when he himself becomes an adult.

If a child is hyperactive, then it is very important to know what parents should do so that this activity becomes as safe and beneficial as possible for the child, without causing concern to others. The advice of an experienced psychologist or mothers, grandmothers who survived these difficult periods of upbringing and personality development will help young parents cope with this problem.

Causes of hyperactivity

There are several reasons that can cause hyperactivity in children. These include:

In order to determine whether a child is hyperactive, not only the advice of a psychologist, but also a family doctor is needed to exclude or confirm the cause of such a condition.

If the cause is a state of health, then it is necessary to strengthen the child and prevent hyperactivity from developing into a psychological problem and becoming a negative character trait. If your child is hyperactive everywhere: at home, in children's groups, on walks, in children's institutions, then it's time to find out what to do and get practical advice psychologist.

Hyperactivity or lack of attention?

Sometimes hyperactivity disorder is confused with attention deficit disorder. How to distinguish them? Very simple. If the above signs are manifested in a child both at home and outside the home, then we can say that overactivity is taking place. If they appear only within the walls of the house, then pay attention to your attitude towards the child, start communicating more with the baby, go for walks with him, read books, watch cartoons, etc.

There is also a place for the combination of these two syndromes. Doctors call it ADHD for short - Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. This cider can only be determined by a doctor. Based on the research, he will conclude what kind of treatment the child needs, whether the help of a psychologist, psychotherapist or other pediatrician is needed.

Today, there are many medical drugs that can help the child and completely stop such conditions. They are aimed at calming the nervous system, balancing the child's behavior, helping to focus, improve memory.

Medication is prescribed in the morning, before visiting the child kindergarten or schools. The drugs are available in the form of sweets, capsules, chewable plates, sweet syrups. Only a doctor prescribes treatment after talking with parents, since treatment should be comprehensive and include not only taking medications, but also changing the child's lifestyle.

In order to get the baby out of this state, the help of not only a therapist, a psychotherapist, but also a psychologist is needed. What should a psychologist do with a hyperactive child?

For such children it is developed individual plan on lifestyle changes, in which there are clear recommendations on what can and cannot be done to a toddler. The plan may include sessions with a psychologist in relaxation and behavioral therapy, in which the child is taught to relax, calm down, breathe correctly, and do deep breathing exercises. Spend psychological studies during which children are taught to set goals and achieve them.

If hyperactivity is diagnosed, then not only parents and doctors, but also teachers at school should know about it in order to develop an individual plan for helping the child: allow them to complete tasks for a longer time, sit on their own quiet place in class.

Benefits of being hyperactive

Scientists were able to find out that the ADHD syndrome also has positive aspects. A hyperactive child is:

Many hyperactive children are very talented and artistically gifted individuals!

Tips from psychologists on raising hyperactive children

First of all, children with detected symptoms of hyperactivity and ADHD syndrome should receive qualified help from a psychotherapist and psychologist. To eliminate adverse manifestations, parents do not need to neglect the medication course of treatment. It is also necessary to adjust the daily routine of the child, the intake of vitamins and the correct
diet. It is necessary to carry out physical education with the child, joint walks in the fresh air, take him to visit interesting circles, non-aggressive sports sections.

These classes should contribute to the development in crumbs of systematicity, structure, correct and clear interaction with the outside world. They need encouragement, rewards for tasks completed to the end and a big manifestation parental love, affection and attention to your life.

A few rules, the implementation of which will help raise a hyperactive child

Performing all these simple actions, listening to advice, you can grow a genius or a true master in any important area of ​​​​life from a fidget, seething with energy, unable to sit still for a minute, constantly asking an unthinkable number of questions. The main thing with such children is patience and love. Everything else is a series of regularly performed actions that a specialist will determine for you. Your task is simply to make them.