How to be a happy woman in 14 pleasant steps. What bonuses hides loneliness? Use them and become a happy woman

For every woman to feel inner harmony and happiness, you need to give yourself time, attention and care. Even the most caring of men will never be able to satisfy all the desires and needs of a woman - they are so diverse and sometimes contradictory.

To achieve complete happiness, inner comfort and well-being, a woman must know what fills her with energy and pleasure. Therefore, we have compiled for you a list of activities that will help you find indescribable satisfaction from life, a sense of joy and tranquility. The result from the methods described below is not short-term: energy and joy will become your constant companions.

1. Regularly visit a massage parlor. The body of a woman languishes without touching and caresses. It must be kneaded, stroked, kneaded, otherwise the vital energy of a woman will stagnate, put pressure on the body from the inside. This can lead to sickness and disease. If there is no opportunity to go for a paid massage, do it yourself at home, or ask your loved one. Watch a video on the topic, read about the massage technique and get down to business!

2. Lead healthy lifestyle life. Bad habits take away not only health, money and beauty, but also joy and energy. Quit smoking, drinking, swearing, and staying up late. You will have so much energy, joy and enthusiasm that another success will certainly await you!

3. Read poetry. Not everyone loves poetry, but try to find one that resonates with your soul. You will feel harmony and comfort from reading "your" poetry, understandable and close to you. It will also help you speak more beautifully, and you will start to think more correctly!

4. Meet your girlfriends from time to time. Women's communication, even if it is only a discussion of children, men and clothes, brings a lot of benefits. This is a kind of exchange of energy that can strengthen each of the participants in the conversation. So, it is easier for a woman to cope with her own problems and experiences, while a man will be more helped by internal dialogue and work on himself.

5. Go for walks. Walking on fresh air needed by a woman at least once a day. Contact with nature is very important to us. Walking has a positive effect on the hormonal background and the general well-being of a woman.

6. Listen to your favorite music every day. It can be the same music or different every day, classical or popular - it doesn't matter. Favorite music cheers up, improves well-being and inspires us!

7. Acquire the ability to relax. If you're not at work, stop difficult topics and discussions. A woman, for youth and beauty, needs to “turn off” her head, relax and not strain her with endless thoughts. Thinking about trifles can also be useful and correct!

8. Pamper your body with a fragrant bath. Let your bath smell fragrant with oils, and in the water itself there will be foam or rose petals. This will help your skin shine with freshness and purity, and you yourself will be guaranteed relaxation and relaxation. good mood!

9. Learn basic yoga postures. This will calm your mind and give it strength, and give your body endurance and flexibility.

10. Try taking vocal lessons. Even if the expression “A bear stepped on your ear” is personal for you, this is not a reason to refuse such activities. The fact is that singing clears the chakra, which is located in the throat. After such a cleaning, you are unlikely to want to swear, reproach and cut your soulmate.

11. Go shopping. Oddly enough, but you can visit the shops without money. Just try on clothes, enjoy your beauty in new things - this charges women with happiness and energy.

12. Connect with seniors and more wise women. Here we will talk about the transfer of knowledge and female wisdom, the opportunity to look at your life from the other side. Communication with mother, grandmother, great-grandmother and a qualified female psychologist is suitable.

13. Dance. For sexuality and new strength, the female body needs movement and rhythm. Give preference to sensual dance styles: Latin American, Arabic and others.

14. Take care of animals and flowers. Caring and caring for those who need it is a great way for a woman to fill up with energy and satisfaction.

15. Help the one who asked you. This is one of the most powerful tools that makes you feel much better, more confident and happier. You can also feel free to ask for help - this also strengthens feminine energy.

16. Read books that interest you and visit bookstores. Reading books is very inspiring for women, gives them a breadth of thought and rewards them with new knowledge. From time immemorial, women have been the keepers of knowledge and passed it on to their children.

17. Delegate some household chores to family members. Here you will have several bonuses at once: there will be more free time, and the help provided to you will warm and amuse.

18. Cook food with pleasure. Everything related to cooking is given to any woman from God, so you just need to reveal the hidden potential in yourself or improve your existing skills. Cooking with soul endows a woman with strength, tenderness, satisfaction and kindness.

19. Do not leave unfinished business and assignments. Master the planning and stick to a clear schedule of tasks and responsibilities in order to be on time. This will help you always stay confident, calm and balanced.

20. Bring sophistication into your life. Let there be a beautiful tablecloth, candles and gourmet delicacies on the table. Let there be fresh flowers on the table in your house (you can even give them to yourself), and let pictures hang on the walls. Let your wardrobe be beautiful and stylish outfits. Ennoble your life, home, wardrobe and everything that surrounds you. This will make you not only more attractive, but also more harmonious and contented. The magic of life is in the little things!

21. Nurture, communicate and educate children. Only with children can a woman reveal all her facets, natural instincts and talents. Play with children, teach them how to sculpt, draw and everything that you can do - you will feel happiness, as it is, to the fullest.

22. Try yourself in the courses acting skills. Let's remember the great Shakespeare: "All life is a game, and the people in it are actors." Emotions is the second name of a woman. Therefore, by trying on images and roles, a woman learns to better understand herself and her life situation, to control her facial expressions, gestures, and gait. The game gives a woman a special grace and seductiveness.

23. Do not skimp on makeup and personal care. This advice gives a lot of pleasure to the woman herself, and also stacks men in piles. A woman who looks good is doing herself a big favor: she pleases herself, delights men, and makes other women angry!

24. Drop envy. Never compare yourself to others - we are all different and not similar friend on a friend. Embrace your uniqueness and remember that you can never be the best at everything.

25. Wear dresses (you can skirts). Feminine elements of clothing have a very strong influence on a woman. She blossoms, grows younger, becomes more tender, charming and touching.

26. Watch romantic movies, read novels. It makes us happy and feminine.

27. Explore new cultures. This is a way not only to expand your worldview, to become more interesting and erudite. This method will help you not to become isolated in yourself.

28. Spend time near the water. It is extremely necessary for a woman to come into contact with water: rivers, lakes, the sea. Such a pastime will help a woman to be filled with harmony, sexuality and complete satisfaction.

29. Exercise Regularly physical activity. For a woman, this is not just a way to keep herself in great shape, but also a source of energy, strength and good mood.

30. Remove all rubbish and blockages from your life and home. Start small, keep only the clothes you like and wear regularly in your closet. Conduct an audit of things in your home, give unnecessary ones to those who need them and who cannot afford them. Emotional rubbish is harder to deal with. Use meditative or psychological techniques. The space freed from rubbish will be filled with light, purity and energy.

31. Appreciate what you have. Be grateful for everything around you. It is not easy to learn this, but with such an attitude to life, you will become much happier and more content.

32. Regularly pay attention to your hands. Do a manicure, moisturize and take care of your hands. Men just want to kiss well-groomed, beautiful female hands.

33. Visit exhibitions, museums, galleries. This will give you energy, an even deeper look at the world, and also decorate your appearance. Everything beautiful makes a woman even more attractive and charming!

34. Find yourself a mentor. Favorite authors of books, lecturers, clerics and just acquaintances from Everyday life that are admired.

35. Start your own diary. It is very important to splash out on paper and then be aware of your desires, thoughts, fears and goals. Then we can work on analyzing everything recorded, thereby improving our lives in the future.

36. Make a collage of beautiful pictures. Let you have an album with your most beautiful, most the best photos. Enjoy yourself and your beauty! It is very important for a woman to realize her beauty, charm and uniqueness. Your collage will be a reminder of how beautiful and unique you are.

37. Define the circle of your desires. Reflect on what you want out of life, especially in your personal life. Write down thoughts on paper - so there are more chances that everything written is realized in your life. Men set clear goals: “I can”, “I will do”. Women's approach is different: "I want" and "I need" and to real woman, filled with energy, everything comes and is attracted, as if by itself. Without anguish, effort and overexertion.

38. Make your speech sweet and sweet. Control your voice, its timbre and intonation. When you speak softly, gently with everyone, especially with men, your energy will double.

39. Learn to be flexible. Sometimes in a dispute, a competition, it is better for a woman to give in and remain calm and balanced. What a woman furious with a dispute looks like, an imperious and in no way inferior woman is a very funny and caricatured sight.

40. Be selective when engaging in intimate relationships. A woman will feel joy and happiness in a sexual relationship with the one she loves. Otherwise, she will face devastation and loss. vitality.

41. Always be clean (household, clothes, own body). This preserves and increases female energy and strength.

42. Engage in needlework (modeling, knitting, beads, sewing, pottery). In the arsenal of needlework classes, there is sure to be something that will be interesting and pleasant for you.

43. Learn to praise people and compliment them. This will make your life brighter, kinder and more beautiful.

44. Learn to openly express love. Kiss, hug, stroke your loved ones and relatives, say kind words. You will feel how you become happier and more joyful.

45. Learn how to make bouquets. New strength and energy from working with flowers are provided to you.

46. ​​Eat right. Eat more fruits, vegetables and other natural and useful products. Eat an apple rather than a sandwich. This is not only a guarantee of health, but also optimism.

47. Spend some time alone. Do what you love in moments of loneliness. It is at such moments that the right and brilliant ideas come to us.

48. If you sleep alone in bed, put a soft toy in bed. It is harmful for a woman to sleep alone, and a plush animal will give warmth and comfort.

49. Buy yourself a new perfume. A pleasant aroma enhances a woman and makes her more confident, sexy and happy!

50. If you want a change, change your hair color. Changes won't take long!

family inspiration 03.10.2018

My dear readers, the female half, for sure, each of you asked yourself questions about how to become and be happy. Sometimes we catch this state by accident, sometimes we create it consciously, and sometimes we miss it again, get lost and search again. Many women, over the years and experience, develop their own picture of whether there is happiness in life and what it is.

Today we decided to talk on this topic with a specialist who professionally deals with the topic of female happiness. Our guest is psychotherapist Sergey Oganezov, specialist International Institute Psychosomatic health (Moscow).

And although Sergey advises both men and couples, but the main circle of his clients are women. So different, with dissimilar stories, but everyone is led for help and support by the desire to change their life, to make it better, happier, to reveal their capabilities.

Sergey Oganezov provides psychotherapeutic assistance to women both in an individual format and in the format of women's support groups, and conducts educational work. Today on our blog, Sergey shares his vision of the three main ingredients of female happiness. I give him the floor.

I want to warn you right away: now there are a lot of trainings in which a bunch of techniques “about happiness” are done. Perhaps each individually can be good, but because of the lack of understanding of the trainers, how and why to use them, they do not carry any charge, and the girls rush around these trainings and, not finding answers to their questions, are disappointed and stop developing. Therefore, be careful in which hands you trust yourself.

Princes and horses

Every girl wants to be happy, every girl draws images, static images. A rich prince in a white suit on a white horse, always smiling, has a good sense of humor, oh ... well, when he is naked, his whole body flexes with muscles, and he is so well built that you can show off to your girlfriends. The white stone house is 400 meters, a large plot and a “full bowl house”. Mercedes, or rather Bentley, two children, a governess who looks after them. Daily activities: beauty bag, fitness, hairdresser, massage, parties. Here it is happiness.

I described the average picture of happiness, we understand that each girl is an individual, respectively, images and priorities may differ.

speech, on this moment, not about the content, but about the fact that our consciousness draws happiness to us with images, pictures, and we have to live in a temporary format, in a stream. We perceive, that is, we feel actions, events, interactions - this is what surrounds us all the time. That is what interests us in this article.

Secret Ingredient #1: Mindfulness

Returning to our eventful fabric that permeates us every day, I can confidently state that not many people are consciously in it and focus their attention on what is happening. This is the main idea.

We need to be aware. What does it mean? We must be able to understand with our souls what we like and what we don't.

Better write it down on a piece of paper. Let's say I like to get up early, I like coffee in the morning, I like well-groomed nails, I like warmth, I like to be able to take a shower. Here it is necessary to write what I do not like. Let's say I don't like being lectured, I don't like being unappreciated, I don't like spending my weekends cleaning, I don't like it when time is wasted on empty talk. And the third point is to write what is not essential for you.

You can tell me, what a simple, stupid practice. I will answer you: this is the first step to a conscious life, the first step to happiness.

In my practice, I have become convinced that, on average, women come to this awareness by the age of 35, men by 40. This happens because before this age we are overwhelmed by the flow of affairs and events and, as a rule, we are not up to awareness, we need to run and reach. For many, this period is a discovery, as they realize what long time they didn't live the way they wanted to.

And imagine that by the time of this realization, a person no longer has that reserve of strength, energy, opportunities to change something. Such revelations can plunge a person into a deep depression. Of course, life does not end there for most, but we are not talking about that now ...

Returning to the above, we came to the importance of awareness, that is, understanding the conditions in which we feel good, and let's call them the "comfort zone". How do you think a person who is in the comfort zone will feel? That's right, he will feel great, have fun and the body will give out a "positive" hormonal background. A person experiences positive feelings, and they are expressed in positive emotions. What do you think the state of long stay in your comfort zone? This is happiness!

On a separate note, I would like to talk about relationships. This is very important because relationships make up the bulk of your comfort zone. For girls, it can be quite difficult to determine the realities of what is happening in a relationship. Girls are emotional beings, as we said above, at certain moments they think in desires, images, idealize everything that happens in a couple.

And at this moment, it would be good for her to turn on all her sensitivity and begin to evaluate every moment that happens. Not for nothing in Russia there is a saying "You can't deceive the heart." What is it about? Let's say a young man said something, but the girl has an ideal picture in front of her, supported by a hormonal background. At the same time, a girl who knows her comfort zone and understands her desires feels that the man’s proposal does not quite fit in with her comfort zone, or, conversely, feels that she has found a “soul mate”.

When a girl meaningfully puts pluses and minuses to all the results of communication, she can conclude how much this partner fits into her comfort zone. Unfortunately, the same thing happens only at the material level, but you can earn wealth, and you cannot live happily without a comfort zone, even in wealth.

In hindsight, we have found that awareness and understanding of your comfort zone is the basis for building your happiness, but that's not all...

Secret Ingredient #2: Responsibility

In order for happiness to happen in your life and belong to you, one more ingredient is needed. This is responsibility. Yes, you need to take responsibility into your own hands. At receptions I hear many stories that she had everything: the house was full, he loved me, he did everything for me, looked after me, protected me. In the course of studying the situation, as a rule, it turns out that these were not partnerships, but parent-child relationships.

The girl, fluttering out of her parental nest while still quite young, fell under the care of her “new parent” - her husband, who created a comfort zone for his ward. But, as a rule, such relationships are doomed, since life does not stand still and always presents its tests. At a time when a man, for whatever reason, cannot take care of his infantile wife, she has to take care of herself, and often of her children. And this pattern of behavior is not developed in her.

She is overcome by fears for her and her children's future, as a result, this state turns into syndromic anxiety states, with all possible manifestations: manifestations of the autonomic system at the bodily level; due to the predominance of stress hormones (cortisol and prolactin) at the chemical level, mental reactions develop in the form of depressive states, apathy, panic attacks, delusional manifestations, actualization of the hysterical component.

This all arises from the unwillingness to take responsibility for your life. This is not the end of life and there is an opportunity to help a person. However, it is better to start educating such a pattern of behavior as responsibility for your life at a young age, when you are still under parental care.

Secret Ingredient #3: Energy

And that's not all ... There is another secret ingredient - this is energy. Building your comfort zone takes energy. These are the forces that give us the opportunity to realize, accept, convince, endure, feel all those events that occur on the way to our comfort zone.

Yes, sometimes you have to fight, win, lose, fall, get up, go, and all this requires energy. Where can a girl get it from? The sources of this energy are very individual. Someone is supported by active work, someone by status, someone by relations with relatives, someone draws strength from social activities, sports or hobbies, and someone in general in seclusion, meditation.

Each girl must find her own source of energy, that is, being in awareness, protect herself from "blackouts". She always knows what to do in difficult times, where and how to save herself and replenish her vitality.

Here you can add another very important and large topic, the meaning of which is best disclosed in a separate article. An incredibly strong and wide source of energy in its channel is love. As a rule, this feeling gives a feeling of wings behind the shoulders, the absence of obstacles - in other words, the state of flow.

We catch the bird of happiness - with our own hands

Summarizing all of the above, we can draw the following conclusions.

A girl needs to consciously build her comfort zone. The comfort zone, in the end, is that platform, that tangible, significant part so necessary "women's happiness". To build a comfort zone, a girl needs to develop in herself with young years three main qualities: awareness, responsibility and the ability to accumulate and save energy.

1. Mindfulness is a skill to monitor, track and filter the admission into her life of events, phenomena, people that correspond to her comfort zone.
2. Responsibility is a necessary pattern of behavior that gives us independence, sovereignty, in order to act in an equal, partner position in relationships and be able to defend our comfort zone.
3. Energy is the forces that lead and move us on the way to the comfort zone. Our task is to identify and learn how to use the sources of this energy in order to achieve results more efficiently and faster.

For women who need help and support on the path of their formation and development, we created the Woman Talk project), within which we conduct women's psychotherapeutic groups, individual consultations, and training events. It is a great joy to see how our girls grow up, take steps towards their happiness, open up and flourish.

The notorious Kozma Prutkov answered the question of how to be happy for both women, men, and children - in general, for all representatives of humanity, a long time ago. That is, he did not at all specify to whom his remark refers, as if hinting that, regardless of gender, age, social status and creed, feeling happy is a matter of ability, not circumstance. But such versatility even plays into our hands, because, if, according to rumors, even a hare can be taught to smoke, then you can even try to teach a reasonable person to be happy in any situation. Therefore, without going into the subtleties of the psychology of the happiness of hares, today we will try to be happy. Despite everything and in spite of everything, constantly and regularly, expressively and contagiously. So that others not only want to smile back, but also follow you to the ends of the world in the hope of warming up and, perhaps, getting a piece of your dazzling happiness for themselves. Share or not - you decide. Although we are for sharing the good. And even more so with happiness, which multiplies by division and from this it only becomes more and purer. Ready? Then let's start.

Like any complex structure, happiness depends on what it is filled with. And this filler is stored nowhere except in your head and soul. These two receptacles of happiness should be at least 2/3 filled with the correct, happiness-providing components. Then the remaining third, even if it contains components that are not very conducive to a sense of happiness, will not be able to prevent you from being happy. Therefore, the first thing you have to do to become truly (that is, internally, and not just externally) happy woman, is to conduct a deep internal audit in order to discover, analyze and sort everything that makes up your inner world and, as a result, forms a view of the external world. Believe me, you will discover many unexpected things. Unexpectedly interesting, unexpectedly pleasant and unexpectedly disappointing. Miscellaneous. This is not scary - the main thing is that you find in yourself such mandatory conditions for happiness:

1. Love (or at least sympathy) for yourself. Because you yourself are the main and only person who was, is and will always be with you, from the first breath to the last. And, if this main person in life does not love you, then what kind of happiness can we talk about? Self-love begins with recognizing, then understanding and accepting yourself. Forgive yourself for those shortcomings that are not critical and are part of your unique personality. Work (precisely as a process carried out with pleasure) and the elimination of those shortcomings that prevent you from enjoying life. And all this is not egocentrism, but healthy egoism, which is necessary for every person at least for self-preservation among other people. And than more people around - the stronger your “armor” of self-love should be.
   She, like chain mail from links, consists of taking care of her health ( proper nutrition, daily routine, physical activity, rejection of addictions, sufficient rest, attention to anxiety symptoms), about their appearance (facial and body care, high-quality cosmetics, beautiful clothes, manicure, haircut) and about their mental comfort (interesting and educational books, favorite music, high-quality movies, communication with good people, caring for relatives, small and large nice gifts for yourself). All this delivers joy that is close to happiness both in essence and in form. And not momentary, but long-playing, leaving in the soul a feeling of deep satisfaction with what is happening here and now, with life as a whole, with itself. If all this, or at least most of this, you found in yourself and your life during the revision, check the box next to this item. You have fulfilled the first condition of happiness. Just do not confuse self-love with narcissism, which not only does not contribute, but also negates the feeling of happiness. How and why - we will discuss a little later, in the section on "anti-happiness".
   
2. Independence from others. Independence is not so much material (although it largely determines the feeling of freedom and related happiness), but internal: from other people's opinions, desires and pressure. Here it is very important to distinguish between actual independence, which tends more to questions of circumstances, and therefore, as we agreed, cannot ensure happiness as such, and psychological independence, which determines inner mood. Because, no matter how objectively wonderful you are, subjectively it is impossible for everyone to like you, and sooner or later there will be a person around who will not like you. If you are touched by his negative opinion, you are guaranteed stress. Stress - main enemy happiness. And the most effective weapon against him is his own head on his shoulders. It's good to listen to other people, but your own opinion should always be a priority for you personally. Not to mention that it should be at all.
   No one can force an internally independent person to do what he does not want and from which he will be unhappy, and to accept into his life people who are unpleasant to him, and therefore not needed. Only a strong and independent person can be independent and happy. Because to be a happy woman or not to be is also your own choice and decision that you need to make and have the courage to follow it. As long as someone else's opinion can push you off this road, you risk spending too much time on the path to happiness. Not that it doesn't exist - haste is not on the list of habits of happy people at all. But it's just a pity to spend precious years, months, even a few days, knowing that they could be much better and more pleasant for you, and you during all this time - to be a happy woman. So look for independence in yourself and the inner core on which it relies. Find - fulfill one more condition of happiness, together with the previous paragraph, having already replenished more than half of its volume!
   
3. Conscious desires. Life by touch, without understanding own desires, goals and at least approximate ways to achieve them resembles the process of making a pie in the dark or blindfolded in someone else's kitchen. Imagine that not a single jar of ingredients is signed, and you cannot see their contents either. Randomly put and mix everything that accidentally comes to hand or that someone will serve to your taste. What kind of dish do you think will result from such cooking? The only thing that can be said for sure about it is that it will not meet your expectations and needs. The analogy can be continued with a hypermarket where you will not find milk in the bread section. But all analogies are aimed at explaining: you will not find happiness in your life until you understand what happiness is for you personally.
   

How to become a happy woman?
The inner readiness to become/be happy is the main and almost the only condition for this. Moreover, the world knows many examples and proofs that external circumstances really do not play a role in this at all. leading role if they play at all. Remember the happy eyes of a rural child who was given a newborn kitten to hold in his hands, and the squeamish displeasure of a teenager from a wealthy family who received a smartphone of not the most fashionable color as a gift. Or situations in which people of the same age, but living in different historical eras, could feel happy. Even a cursory comparison is enough to understand that the conditions for happiness are parameters, pardon the pun, extremely conditional. And this means that we can use almost any of them for our own purposes. That is, with one main goal - to be a happy woman.

Of course, life is different, and sometimes very difficult. Sometimes it's just not possible to save positive attitude when the whole world turned against you. But the subtlety of this period lies in the fact that the higher your personal ability to be happy, the faster you will recover from shocks and return a sense of happiness to your picture of the world. Even athletes get injured and lose the opportunity to train, sometimes for a long time. But upon returning to the gym, it is easier for an athlete to return to the previous parameters than for a person with a weak body and soul. So let's just not focus on the bad and focus on the extreme manifestations of unhappiness. Instead, let's remember those things, attitudes and life guidelines, which help us to withstand even the strongest storm and, in spite of everything, be a happy woman:

1. Don't complicate.“Thanks to” public propaganda, we have been accustomed since childhood to believe that everything good must be earned, and, even worse, that “happiness must be fought for.” It is these attitudes that do not allow us to be happy already in adulthood. In fact, happiness is simple, it is even simpler than simple. Nature created a person happy, this is his normal state, but the lack of happiness was just conceived as a sign of some kind of violation. Therefore, relax and, for starters, just allow yourself to be happy without much reason, achievements and merit. Just because you live in the world, that this morning you opened your eyes, saw the sun and the sky. And if at the same time you also saw the eyes of a loved one, and in addition a smile in these eyes, then you are definitely happier huge amount people on the planet. This happiness is simple. It comes as a basic set to each of us from the Creator.
   Keeping it simple also means not making too high demands on your idea of ​​happiness. For some reason, many are sure that it is impossible to be happy without ... and then it follows long list from all sorts of conditions and requests. Wanting more is good. To be unhappy as long as this is not there is bad. Just imagine how much happier you will be when you get what you want. It is “happier than now”, and not “finally happy”. Feel the difference and with that feeling move on to the next paragraph.
   
2. Live in the present. With all the desire, happiness cannot be planned or rescheduled for tomorrow / next week / other convenient time. It either exists or it doesn't. Happiness is what is here and now, felt and experienced by you constantly, as a life background, and still every time anew. Therefore, if you think that happiness, which for one reason or another does not exist now, will come with time, you are mistaken. Whatever you are guided in the depths of your soul, whatever is your authority and guideline, this rule is the same for everyone. Psychologists, esotericists, Buddhists, psychics and even your mother unanimously admit to you that happiness needs to be caught by the tail right away, there may simply not be another time. This does not mean that you need to fuss, it means that you do not need to put off and write a “draft” of your life, being afraid to make a blot in a clean copy.
   Stop endlessly rummaging through childhood traumas and looking for the causes of your misfortunes in them. Do not even think about looking into the future, looking for hints of possible failures in it. And even the future, for that matter, is built on the basis of the present and the foundation of the past. Therefore, if there is no happiness today, then where will it come from tomorrow? We say this not to shake your faith in a bright future, but to ensure that this future comes as soon as possible. More precisely, so that you create it for yourself as soon as possible with your own hands. And we sincerely believe that you are not only capable, but also ready not to wait, but to act in order to be a happy woman.
   
3. Act. A simple pattern, like links in one chain, develops as follows: pleasure - satisfaction - the habit of rejoicing - happiness. Move forward gradually. What gives you pleasure? Walking in the fresh air, dancing, drawing, music, reading, shopping ... Do more often what brings you joy. Create a positive background for everything that happens in your life, constantly increasing the ratio of these events in favor of positive ones. Get up and go to happiness. Too lazy to go - crawl. There is no strength to crawl - lie down, but only in such a way that it really pleases you. Sooner or later, you will get tired of lying anyway and will be drawn to do something more interesting.
   From experience, the more interesting and richer life- the happier she is. According to statistics, there are many more unfortunate women among convinced housewives than among those who are busy with work, favorite business, any kind of activity. Is the hint clear? Again, the busier you are, the less time you have to listen to yourself for old and new reasons to be sad. But while you are preparing a quarterly report, embroidering with a cross, running around the city in search of that very skirt or jumping like a goat in the gym, you do not interfere with your subconscious mind slowly but surely taxiing on the true path leading to that very, natural, nature-programmed feeling of happiness . So just get busy. Anyone, and better - pleasant. Not necessarily alone and not necessarily only for your own benefit, however, that's how you like it better!
   
4. To love and to be loved. In that order: first give warm feelings, and then receive them in return. Not because you need to run and fight for the object of your love yourself. But because waiting for love without doing anything is the same as waiting for happiness with folded hands, and we have just discussed the futility of this activity. Therefore, educate, grow, cultivate love in yourself. First to yourself, then to the closest people, then to the less close, but the most attractive. And finally, just love for the whole world and life in general. And women's happiness, if we narrow this concept down to a gender framework, it also includes a beloved husband, who at the same time remains a luxurious lover and a devoted friend. In a mischievous, smart and like two drops of water child who comes running to kiss you in the morning and demand syrniki with jam for breakfast. In a warm and hospitable house, where comfort is created by your hands and the most delicious and healthy food is prepared. In the admiring glances of the surrounding men, in the husband's inexhaustible tenderness over the years, in contentment with his own reflection in the mirror. Well, how can you not love all this? Well, how, loving all this, you can not be a happy woman?!
   

What difference does it make what they think of you? If you are happy with the decisions you have made, then you have made the right choice, no matter what others say. Imagine how much effort you spend trying to read other people's minds, and still do not guess.

Listen to advice - please, but do not let others decide how you live.

2. Anger and resentment

The next time you catch yourself feeling this way, think about this: “Would I like to be the person I envy?” Certainly not, you love yourself (even if somewhere very deep inside).

You are looking at someone else's life that you do not know. You have no idea what this person is thinking. Maybe when he dives into the pool of his private house, he hates himself or is wildly afraid of something? Maybe you, walking through the forest on a sunny day, experience much more pleasure than he does, basking on the snow-white sand in the Maldives?

Stop looking at others. If you feel good now, then everything is right. If not, make it good.

16. Uncertainty

Happy people tend to have self-esteem (just don't confuse it with an inflated ego). They are pleased with themselves and exude confidence.

There is no reason to doubt yourself. If you have traits that you hate, there are two ways: accept them or change them. In every person there is everything at once: a libertine, and a puritan, and a lying bastard, and a gentleman. You choose who you will be.

17. Dependence on others

No one will fill the void within you. No one will make you positive and self-sufficient if you are unhappy with your fate. To share your happiness with someone else, you must first become happy yourself. So do not even hope that your success is in the wrong hands. Only in yours.

18. Past

Living in the past means burying your present. There were mistakes - okay, who didn't? Arrange your memories lavish funeral, remember only lessons and .

19. Total control

Sometimes you just need to relax and let life take its course. You can't control everything and you have to deal with it. Otherwise, you will be constantly nervous, but in the end you still won’t change anything. There are just things that are out of your control. They must be accepted as they are.

20. Expectations

People think that others should live up to their expectations. That's bullshit. Nobody owes you anything, and you don't owe anything either. No one should be polite, attentive, accurate, honest, pleasant in communication, clean, after all. Nothing should be perfect, amazing, unforgettable, but it can be. If it does, great, if not, don't worry. Be ready to accept everything that life sends you, and you will find happiness.

Hello, since you have landed on this page, you probably feel unhappy, or at least not happy enough. Let me tell you how to become a happy woman in 7 days. This will help us 7 simple steps, after which you will feel happy.

But first, let's think about what happiness is? And what is happiness for you? Why don't you feel happy? The answer is simple: happiness is in your head, and in order to feel happy, you just need to believe in happiness. For happiness, a person does not need much, sometimes a glance, attention, a strong hug, or just a good night's sleep is enough.

If you want to be happy, be.

Step 1 Remove all problems to become happier.

The biggest problem for unhappy people is imaginary problems. Don't treat problems like problems. All your problems are trials, closed doors on your path that you just have to go through. You can go through them different ways: go around, jump over, pass by or turn around and leave to look for another way, climb over, break, burn in the end. But in no case should you stand in front of the door and hope that it will open itself. Over time, it will turn out that you will find yourself in a room in which there are many locked doors. If this has already happened, and it seems to you that your situation is hopeless, then do not despair anyway. I said that the doors can be broken, you can dig a tunnel - there is always a way out.

It seems to you that there are many problems. Write down 10 problems on a piece of paper. And cross out 8 of those that are not the most terrible and difficult. Think about how to solve the remaining two problems. The problems and fears of most women are similar: dissatisfaction with themselves, loss of loved ones, lack of money, loneliness, uncertainty about the future, desire to be loved, fatigue.

Do not dwell on problems, do not accumulate them, throw them away.

Step 2 Don't think about what's done because you can't change it.

All people who feel unhappy think they have a lot of problems. You constantly think about them, try to find solutions, worry, replay situations that have already been passed. Has it happened that you go to bed, but then you remember that today at work in front of everyone you said or did something stupid? You begin to think about what your colleagues thought of you, how you should have acted in this situation. What would happen if you acted differently. You begin to delve into yourself and your thoughts, blame yourself. As a result, you can’t fall asleep, and the next day you get up a tired, unhappy person, whose brain didn’t rest all night, but wound up problems that don’t really exist.

One day, my friend told me that she was not happy because she wanted a child, but she and her husband couldn’t do it. One of the reasons for the failure was her excess weight, about which she was warned in the antenatal clinic. The idea became obsessive, she could not find a place for herself, began to hate everyone around, and in the first place happy families and children. The result - she divorced her husband and got two dogs. She became an ardent lover of dogs - she takes them to exhibitions and receives awards. She has lost weight, but now she no longer wants children. According to her stories, she became happy. And I believe that she is happy, because happiness is in her head.

There could be another way - you could lose weight, undergo treatment and still give birth to a child. But whether she would be happy is unknown. We live in the same timeline, we can't change anything. Therefore, you don’t even need to think about what happened if it were different. It is better to think about what to do now in order to be happy in the future.

Step 3: Set goals that will make you happier if you achieve them.

Goals should be specific, time-bound, and achievable. For example, if you want to get married, then just the “Get married” goal will not get you anything. And for example, “During the year I want to find a husband, for this I have to look good every day, go in for sports, communicate a lot in different new companies.” Secondary goals are automatically created, the completion of which will bring you closer to the main goal. An example of a secondary goal: “I must always look good!”. To do this, you need to constantly look after your face and body, dress well. Another goal may arise: "Make money for all this." In this way, a whole tree of goals can be formed. And these are not problems - these are goals, and quite feasible.

Perhaps you are already married, you have children. But you are still not happy. In this case, your goals may be different. But they certainly should be.

A woman who works on herself, on her happiness, simply has no time to think that she is unhappy. She always goes forward and knows her goal.

Step 4. Enjoy every moment of your life.

You must learn to be happy right now. No need to wait for a miracle, and hope that happiness will come sometime later. Will not. It already exists. When you go to the gym for a workout, you should have fun. This is not work for the result - this is a pleasant pastime with a pleasant bonus in the form of beautiful body. When you go to a party, your goal is not to find a husband there, but to enjoy communication. When you do homework with a child - it's not so that he grows up smart and successful, you are spending time with him now and you should enjoy it.

Enjoy every moment, every second. Be happy now.

Step 5. Do not solve other people's problems and do not try on someone else's life.

You don’t need to compare yourself with anyone and you don’t need to try to help everyone. You have your own life - build your own house, you don’t need to carry bricks from a neighbor, drag your own, for your happiness. Don't confuse support with problem solving. If your loved one trouble - support him. But don't force help.

And don't be jealous of others. Now it is very easy to create an external illusion of happiness - show a few photos from the resorts, post a photo with a large bouquet - and it seems that the woman is happy. In fact, everything can be different. Everyone has their own life. One person needs a beach and the sea to relax, another a tour of ancient city. One person loves soap operas, another fantastic movies. We are all different. Someone works to have a good rest, and someone has a rest, so that later they can work well with renewed vigor.

And never blame anyone for your failures. Remember the wisdom: “A fool blames others, a smart man blames himself, a wise man does not blame anyone!”.

Step 6. Don't pay attention to other people's opinions.

Little attention is paid to happy people. Happy people are not interesting for gossip. And, moreover, often cause hostility due to envy. Therefore, the happier you look, the less envious people will notice you. On the contrary, everyone is trying to help the unfortunate, to calm them down, to solve their problems, to discuss them. That's why happy man must take for granted that his happiness is his happiness, which in other people will not always cause positive emotions. A friend is known in trouble, but he is known even more strongly in joy.

Not always people will approve of your actions. If you take care of yourself, many will be skeptical about your undertakings, and maybe even condemn. This should not lead you astray towards your goal and should not prevent you from being happy. People are not jealous because you are happy. They are angry with themselves for not being able to pull themselves together and make their lives happy, like yours.

Step 6. Share your happiness.

Smile and always be positive. You must be confident in yourself - self-confidence gives strength and improves mood. You may have noticed that when you put on a new outfit, you feel more confident, it seems to you that everyone sees how stylish and beautiful you are. It's hard to be sad at this moment. Therefore, you must always be a queen so that others feel this royal aura. Show your success, share your goals, share your good mood and smiles with people around you. Talk less, do more. Don't be afraid to break up with people. Your environment will change, people will leave and come - and that's okay. As you grow, so do your interests.

Step 7. Accept yourself for who you are.

There seems to be a contradiction. On the one hand, we are talking about self-development, changing oneself in better side. On the other hand, about the need to love, appreciate, respect yourself the way you are now. And it is true. You need to strive for the best, but everyone needs to love and accept themselves. It doesn't matter how old you are, how much you weigh, social status- you are the best!

Be yourself and do what you want. If you want to dance - dance, if you want to sing - sing. You have one life and one timeline - so live it as fully and varied as possible.

Let this article help you change your very attitude towards your happiness and life, and looking at your life with new, happy eyes, you yourself will understand what you need to be happy!

Tell me in the comments, did you manage to be happy? What can you advise other girls to become happy?

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