How to overcome envy at work if they envy you? Difficult relationships in the team: how to deal with the envy of colleagues.

It's not always safe to evoke strong feelings in your co-workers. True, office romances are even considered by many to be useful, they say, the productivity of labor increases among colleagues involved in them. But if one of your colleagues inflamed with black envy towards you, you won’t get into trouble. However, envious people can be fought. The main thing is to know how. “You are simply envied…” – we often hear this phrase from friends and colleagues if they want to reassure us. Were you suddenly rude? So, they are jealous. A friend indelicately said: “I would like your problems ...” Jealous. Colleague criticized at the meeting. And he is right there! A universal answer that explains nothing, does not help anyone and does not have any effect other than temporarily strengthening self-esteem.

To envy in an adult way means to constantly live in a complex system of comparison. Yourself with others. Others - with you. At the same time, the social environment actively pushes us to such a comparison. How can you ride the subway when the same manager from my department is driving? I work with all my might, refuse the child new markers and, finally, buy a "ten". For a couple of days (weeks if I'm lucky) I'm happy and cheerful. But the fact is that another girl in our department has a foreign car. Her dad gave her. I don’t have such a dad, it’s impossible to save anymore, and I’m starting to quietly dislike her. Because I forget an important psychological rule: it is completely impossible to satisfy needs!

Moreover, it is dangerous. After all, our needs are a motivator, an impulse that gives us energy to move, develop, earn money. If a person has everything, then one thing remains - to come up with a desire that is basically impossible. For example: to help all those in need, to find the meaning of life or something similar - philosophical and lofty. This is not possible for everyone. Remember the TV series "The rich also cry ..." And they really cry. And how. This is because beauty does not guarantee happiness, wealth does not equal security, and even a beloved child brings not only joy, but also a lot of other emotions.

What to do with all this?

Let's consider ourselves "psychologically advanced" people and fight the life-poisoning feeling of envy. It is very important to consciously work on it and remember the following. First, we are all going to die. Regardless of the number of achievements, money and cars in the garage. Secondly, we are equally defenseless against fate. Anyone can slip on a banana peel and become disabled (pah-pah). We are all in an equal position when it comes to serious things. As soon as you manage to "catch" this feeling, the feeling of envy disappears.

Envious people (not such "advanced" people like us) really attack and quite often. There are three main ways to behave in such situations.

Disguise

Using this method, you need to stop demonstrating your well-being and complain as often as possible. For anything - for an unfinished family life, for the inability to master the simplest things ... For a woman, the complete rejection of cosmetics and the replacement of a fashionable haircut with a “goodbye youth” hairstyle are especially effective. Perhaps in this case, the "gap" between her and the envious colleague (from the point of view of the latter) will decrease and the aggression will weaken. The downside is that the "masquerade" will feel defeated. This often entails a depressed state, loss of interest in work and other joys of life. After all, an important psychological law has been violated: violence against one's personality, as a rule, has negative consequences.

In general, this behavior should be left as a last resort. It's never too late to apply it.

War

Well, it's clear. We do our best to demonstrate our own successes and achievements, bring beauty, share happy moments with colleagues family life, shows photos from Jamaica. Desired result: the opponent begins to experience negative emotions so strong that his behavior becomes inadequate. Psychological law: the stronger the emotions that a person experiences, the more difficult it is for him to maintain the chosen line of behavior. If we piss off the enemy, our chances of winning increase.

At the same time, the victim of envy (in this case, the attacking side) must behave with restraint. Her task is to wait for a colleague to make a real mistake. You can also go to your boss and hint that you are very worried about the behavior of a colleague. No accusations or reproaches. Only friendly concern for a friend and the affairs of the company, to which his unpredictability can cause serious harm.

The way to eliminate the envious is rather difficult and dirty from the ethical side, however, it works almost flawlessly.

Indifference

We will proceed from the fact that all people exist in this world for something creative. Maybe we meet envious people in order to teach tolerance or to demonstrate to others how to take care of parents. It is unlikely that we will know for sure about the people around us. However, it is safe to say that there is a positive in every person.

If we follow this path, then we take two steps: the first - we are looking for a positive, the second - we internally “let go” of this person. Well, God be with him. Forgot. We distance ourselves, and, most importantly, stop living the same life with him. And then the envious person no longer affects your state of mind. You do not discuss anything with colleagues or management. More than that, when they try to talk to you in the style: "Look what she did." Calmly answer: “Come on, it happens to everyone. I got used already". At the same time, inside - complete indifference - not ostentatious. You really don't care, because you have your own inner life.

This method has another valuable effect. As soon as indifference comes, as soon as we “disconnect” and forget about the aggressor, the psychological law begins to operate: we cease to be an attractive victim for the attacker. The envious person stops pestering us.

According to "Elite Personnel"

If in response to the question "How are you?" “No one is jealous” sounded, apparently there is nothing to rejoice at. After all, envy accompanies success and development. And even if suddenly you yourself were strangled by a toad, this can also be useful. Associate Professor of the Institute of Psychology, Belarusian State Pedagogical University named after Maksim Tanka Svetlana Mesnikovich told GO.TUT.BY how to deal with envy.

Svetlana Mesnikovich, candidate of psychological sciences. Photo: Elena Kleshenok, TUT.BY

“And who is the saint here?” What if you never envy anyone

There are people who confidently declare that they never envy anyone. According to Svetlana Mesnikovich, this is an occasion to congratulate them from the bottom of the heart or ... to offer the help of a psychologist.

“The complete absence of envy may indicate two directly opposite facts,” says the specialist. Either the person has reached high level spiritual development (which, unfortunately, is quite rare, and besides, it still involves going through the stage of “recognizing” envy in oneself and liberation from it). Or a person does not want to recognize this feeling and suppresses it. After all good people, which most of us consider ourselves to be, it is not to be envious, is it? Envious people are condemned, they are shunned, and this is fraught with damaged relationships and reputation, hinders career advancement.

"Some are lucky!" How to understand that they envy you

However, in order to recognize envy, the psychologist believes, it is enough just to observe yourself and others.

« So you are already the head of the department! Big man!”- having learned about your appointment, a colleague says and at the same time purses his lips with a thread. According to body language, emotions of joy and benevolent belonging cause the muscles around the mouth to relax, and anger, displeasure, contempt to contract. The envious person also prefers closed poses. Even congratulating someone, he does not turn his whole body to the interlocutor, but says a phrase without raising his head, hiding his face behind a large monitor or crossing his palms in a lock.

- The envious person has three distinctive features, the psychologist points out. - Firstly, he shows a close, sometimes intrusive interest in someone else's life. Secondly, he constantly compares himself and others. Thirdly, he accompanies this with comments emphasizing the undeservedness or illegality of the money, status or other benefits of another: “ That's lucky!», « Look, you were a C student at school!», « Yes-ah, blat is our everything!», « People know how to fit in so well!". If there are all three signs, and even after communicating with such a person you feel inner discomfort, be sure that you are faced with envy.

Envy, by the way, is often disguised as jokes and familiarity. If you report that you have received an award or new position or bought a cottage, witnesses of your success will not fail to say: “ How about putting up?". With such remarks, the authors emphasize that they are not claiming a part of their achievements, which means that their owner, it turns out, is not very worthy of them.

“Forgive me for being so advanced ...” How to behave with an envious person

Envy can also signal itself with heavy sighs and mournful facial expressions in response to the message of someone's success: " And here we live from penny to penny", « And I have been in the same position for twenty years, who will appreciate this plowing!», « Oh, my children will not see such goodness!».

Interestingly, some successful people in response to such remarks ... they begin to make excuses: “ Why, I didn't sleep for so many nights to complete the project!», « Guys, this money for which I bought the car, I inherited from my dead mother!«…

“So a person who has tasted success for the first time easily gets hooked by envious people,” states the psychologist. - Acquisition, reward should be accompanied by a sense of pride and joy. Guilt is a sign of auto-aggression, destroying the feeling of a person who does not love himself enough and depends on the assessments of others. It turns out that you are to blame for what you have achieved? So maybe you also need to ask for forgiveness for the fact that life was a success?

Some successful people, when faced with envy, turn on a defense mechanism and begin to hide any of their achievements. Alas, complete secrecy is a dead end, the psychologist believes: constant control over one’s own words and the degree of awareness of ill-wishers, undivided positive emotions will not allow you to feel the full joy of being. It is imperative to share the emotions that accompany success, but only with those who have already passed the test of someone else's success.

It is dangerous to ignore someone who is painfully experiencing your professional, family or personal ups and downs. For some people, envy grows to the level of neurosis, when emotions are so strong and painful that they are no longer able to concentrate on their own needs, fully communicate and work. It becomes a little easier for such people only when they put their state into action - “on occasion” they remind the authorities that a colleague was late yesterday, they “recommend” as a failed talented report, pour glasses into the opponent’s shoes before the performance, put up a photo in an unsightly form on the social network . The energy of the envious is directed to many hours of “gossip” and “trips”, and the more, the less of it remains for himself, for his own development.

The best way to resist the energy of envy directed at you, the psychologist believes, is to respond to it with gratitude and positive. After all, a person directs so much energy at you - in the form of attention, thoughts, judgments. Through their efforts, your name is on everyone's lips. Do not condemn: it is absurd to condemn internally weak man who has not learned to realize himself.

But at the same time, the psychologist recommends that you distance yourself from the envious person as much as possible or reduce communication with him to a minimum. And when you hear hints of receiving “dividends” from participating in your destiny, you can joke: “ to give you money or natural product? », « I suppose that without you, I probably would not have been able to achieve anything? Offer to pay you for help?", or even better - to remind you of the urgent business that the envious person needs to do.

What to do if envy "sprouted" in you

If envy does not have time to take root, it is called white. It becomes black, concentrated, when it is accumulated for a long time, growing to such a size that it begins to control a person.

Having “caught” this feeling in yourself, the first thing to do is not to evaluate it as good or bad, but simply accept it as a signpost on the path of development. Envy says that some of your needs remained unfulfilled. Answer yourself the question: who and what do I envy? Fitted figure to a friend? A successful colleague's project? His salary or ability?

“It often turns out that you want something completely different from what you were sure of before, communicating with the object of envy,” says Svetlana Mesnikovich. - Women often envy harmony or beauty, but in fact they want male attention or the confidence with which a thin and pretty girlfriend positions herself.

In the practice of a specialist there was such a case. The lonely young artist thought for a long time that she was jealous of her friend because she had a husband and a child. After working with a psychologist, she was surprised to realize that she was not yet ready to start a family. She wanted to have a feeling of satisfaction and joy, which literally shone with a friend when she got married and became pregnant. Realizing that this same feeling appears when she completes her next painting, the girl began to engage in more creativity, achieved the organization of a solo exhibition and, as a result, is very pleased with herself.

The psychologist draws attention: having determined what you really need, it is important to change the comparison vector.

“Compare your achievements not with those who caused envy, but with yourself yesterday,” says Svetlana Mesnikovich. - Otherwise, trying to prove that you are “not worse”, a teenage habit of endless and senseless imitation will take root in you. One object will replace another, and you will follow it like a programmed mechanism. And even having wiped your opponent's nose, feeling the triumph of the winner, quickly get fed up with them, dissatisfaction with life will cover with renewed vigor. True needs will remain unsatisfied.

Is it worth confessing to envy

In some psychological sources, you can find advice to admit to the object of your envy that you are experiencing it. Svetlana Mesnikovich does not support such an idea and recommends it is better to open up to a psychologist or close friend who you trust:

- Saying "on the forehead" to a person that you envy him, in fact, you express your dislike to him, and this destroys the closeness and trust between you, causes wariness. Today he is envious, and tomorrow he will burn down the house (I exaggerate, of course). But the one who himself recognized envy in himself is the least to be feared and shunned. Because as soon as you fix that you are jealous, the feeling loses its power over you. You begin to control your feeling.

Let the next step be an attempt to “melt” envy into respect and admiration. To the one you envy, you can say: It's great that you showed me what to aim for!», « Now I understand what a really cool business plan should be!". By recognizing and learning from someone else's success, you strengthen a good relationship with the person.

What about envy in the comments?

Those who study their inner world, are convinced that the feeling of envy is multicomponent: it contains sadness, anger, annoyance, resentment, jealousy, dissatisfaction with oneself. Of course, in order to see and experience all these emotions, you need to find time for yourself, loved ones, to be alone. But many modern people who are in a hurry all the time, not up to soul-searching.

— Instead, we actively “merge” envy into virtual space, says the psychologist. - Look how many people "hang out" on Internet resources and social networks, where they scribble stinging comments about other people's successes. You read and only have time to state the conclusions inherent in envy: a good salary and a high status - “ It is known who "promoted"! Gives an interview - “sticks out”, “boasts”! He won the competition - “Yes, who is there on the jury so ignorant!«

— But maybe this is good - people "let off steam" ...

- In some cases: when a person is very angry, and then a painful issue for him was raised on the Internet, he sat down at the computer, wrote a post and returned to his usual affairs - this is really a safe way out of emotion. But when envy is directed to different objects and this is repeated again and again, a person throws out all the power of feelings and thoughts and sooner or later is devastated. In addition, unconsciously cultivated envy can lead to so-called psychosomatic diseases. Envious people often suffer from digestion, develop stomach ulcers, and suffer from liver and kidney function.

Why are people envious and evil, huh? What to do if there is an envious person at work? I will answer these questions especially for the readers of Popular about Health. Unfortunately, there are people who cannot rejoice in the happiness and success of others. At the same time, not only colleagues at the workplace, but even the closest people can become envious.

First, envy is the desire of a person to have what another has in abundance. Secondly, the envious person wants evil for a person and he has such behavior that if I don’t have it, then you won’t have it either. You can envy in different ways: someone is more beautiful, smarter, richer, someone has a better position, having children and a family, and so on.

If a person envies and at the same time wishes evil, then this is a destructive feeling. But it can also be said that if a person wants to reach the same heights that the one he envies has reached, and at the same time treats him well, this, on the contrary, will spur him to achieve what he wants, but this does not happen often, basically the envious person experiences a negative feeling towards a more successful comrade, which is bad. Envious people often do not rejoice in other people's successes, they regard it as a kick to achieve their own successes.

Why do people envy other people?

Envy, as a feeling, is formed in the process of education in childhood. Of course, parents wish only the best for their children, but due to their ignorance they give the child proper upbringing.

Envy is often formed due to seemingly simple phrases: "Look what Vali's Nice picture turned out, and what did you draw?" And what will the child feel at the same time? Probably, he will simply hate Valya and just want to tear her picture. It will seem to her that she is less loved because of this. As a result, children's complexes will gradually grow, that will definitely show up in adulthood.

Adults, when they compare children between children, spoil the relationship between children, and also instill a sense of insecurity, fear, distrust. Such a child will feel deprived, offended, he will be uncomfortable.

How to recognize an envious person at work?

Usually an envious person can be calculated, and if such a frame appears at work, there are a number of signs by which it can be identified. For example, such a person has hatred without any objective reasons. If you noticed this from your colleague, then the best option would be not to go into a conflict situation, but simply let her go.

Another feature of an envious colleague is the desire for constant gossip. In addition, the envious person will talk behind his back, they have little courage to go into some kind of direct conflict with the person. A weapon against this can be a frank conversation with the gossip.

In addition, an envious person will simply fly on wings if he finds out that the one to whom he feels envious has suffered a defeat. Nobody is immune from mistakes. Skills and diligence will gradually return the former results, and the envious person will remain where he was. Don't give in to negativity and boldly move forward.

Envious people are the closest competitors. They will always try to get on the same level with you, although you just do your job without looking at others. Do not pay attention to those who burn you with a look of envy from behind, just do not turn around and do not have contact with such people. And further - the best weapon against envious people - this is self-confidence, self-control and a sense of humor.

You can talk to someone who is jealous of you, explain to him the importance of being yourself, that you should not copy another. You can admire the success of the envious person, which will give him confidence. If this is difficult and impossible to do, then just be patient. More often than not, envy is self-doubt. Try to praise the one who envies you, try to celebrate his successes.

People who are envious are the most miserable creatures at heart. Inner fear does not allow them to move forward. If in your power, then think about how you can help such a person so that he becomes happier. Do not waste your energy on a conflict situation, do not spoil the mood.

Recommendations will be like this. Try to limit the time of communication with him to a minimum. Jealous evil people do not know how much effort it takes to achieve success, so you can tell them how much effort you have invested in order to achieve everything. Perhaps the interlocutor will make sure that nothing just fell on you from the sky, but you just need to work and achieve your goals.

Probably, many have heard that you need to be happy quietly. So don't talk about success and good relations with your spouse, always guard your world so that happiness is only yours. Never complain about failures, as this is used by the envious against you and do not react to barbs. Be confident and love yourself. Let go of all past negative events. Live for today, enjoy every little thing.

You can find an amulet that will save you from evil envious people, do it, for example, just pin a pin, especially if you believe in such amulets, then it will work and you will feel much more comfortable on a psychological level. But better than a talisman is a kind and loving attitude towards that person who experiences destructive envious emotions towards you, as a result of such behavior you will experience psychological comfort.

People who work in the same team for a long time become a kind of family with their own way of life, customs and relationships. And relations with relatives, as you know, are not always smooth and cloudless. Here we can also add the fact that between the "relatives"-colleagues, there is a hidden or clearly present moment of struggle for the right to be the best (first, main, irreplaceable). And the more promising the company, the higher the ambitions of its employees, and the tougher the struggle for a “place in the sun” goes on.

Relationships at work can be both a stimulus for development and a reason for dismissal. Some psychologists believe that romantic relationships in the workplace are sometimes beneficial for people who are prone to "burnout" and loss of motivation. However, there are feelings that are far from romantic, capable of poisoning the life of even the most positive and good-natured employee. It's about envy at work.

Very often people tend to justify a negative attitude towards themselves with the usual envy of others. Colleagues look askance? Yes, they are just jealous! Friends avoid communication? They, too, are mired in envy. Did the chief subtract unfairly? And he is generally the most envious!

Such an answer to oneself can temporarily calm and even increase self-esteem. But unfortunately it won't solve conflict situation, will not change the situation in the team and will not help build relationships.

Nobody is immune from envy. Having experienced it for the first time in childhood, a person, no, no, and even envy someone during his life. Do not forget that we all live, looking not inside ourselves, but around. A person is always socially oriented, and, therefore, set up for competition.

The realities of our life are such that being the best means being right, and being the first means being successful. This mechanism was launched by an increase in the standard of living, an abundance of material goods and, of course, the introduction of new standards of success. It is very difficult to resist this mechanism when everyone around is “jumping over each other” in order to grab luck and wealth by the tail.

Many of us confuse our real needs with those of others, thinking that for complete happiness you need only what your competitor has. We stop rejoicing in our own acquisition at the moment when we see a colleague (friend, acquaintance) the best option what we already have. And again we begin the process of satisfying needs, completely forgetting that needs are endless, and it is completely impossible to satisfy them.

What to do in a situation where you really feel a biased, envious attitude towards yourself from colleagues? Is it worth fighting the negativity coming from envious people? There are several ways

put on your mask

Stop bragging right and left about your successes and achievements, as well as large purchases and summer vacation on Bali. Instead, head for moaning and lamenting about your hard life. If a beautiful woman is envied with black envy by her less attractive colleagues, you can temporarily hide your natural gift under the image of a “gray mouse”. The advantage of this tactic is the weakening of aggression on the part of envious people and even, on the contrary, an offer to be friends forever and ever (who would refuse to be a “star” against the background of a wretched friend?). The downside is the feeling of loss and dissatisfaction with one's own position. And really, why should you, in fact, live a life other than yours? Conclusion: this method is for especially difficult cases, when the level of someone else's envy goes off scale and can cause real harm to you.

Start a confrontation

This method is for people with self-respect and violent temperament. Feeling the envious's hot breath in the back, turn to face him and attack. Instead of hiding your merits and advantages in front of a colleague, flaunt them, and try to achieve such success that the envy of your opponent is no longer controlled by him.

In psychology, a phenomenon is well known in which strong emotions lead to inadequacy in behavior. If you notice the throwing of an envious person and his attempts to harm you, and at the same time the whole world, behave as if you are unbearably sorry for the unfortunate. You can also visit the authorities with a request to pay attention to the strange behavior of a colleague that can damage the well-coordinated work of the company. This method, as you understand, is not entirely correct and honest, but its action is trouble-free.

Indifference

Do not forget that man, by nature, is aimed at creation and forgiveness. These are the conditions for comfort not only in the world, but also in one's own soul. Think about it, maybe envy in your address is intended to develop a sense of understanding, forgiveness and condescension.

On the other hand, indifference, as a response to negativity, is the most correct solution. It does not allow the envious person to play on your feelings and awaken negative emotions in you. Try to simply move away from a colleague who is unable to cope with his negative manifestations. Over time, such a distance will allow you to reconsider your attitude towards the envious person, forgive him and understand.

With you in the same team, the most correct thing is to let them know that this is not a secret for you. It is better to do this in front of everyone and in a playful tone. This will knock the cards out of the hands of the enemies, because now their intrigues have a justified reason, which has become clear to everyone.

Be calm and let them "get sick" with your anger and hatred. It also happens that this is a property of character and they just need to experience such feelings for someone. Not seeing you as a frightened victim, they may lose interest in your person and spread to someone else.

Do not react painfully to the attacks of the ill-wisher, do not show that it is or unpleasant for you. Nothing affects people like your confidence and strength. Use your sense of humor, make the ill-wisher an object of ridicule so that he simply fears you. Find a weak spot and make it the target of your "harmless" banter - you will be bypassed.

Sometimes hostility is caused by complexes and self-doubt. Try to act “on the contrary” and, feeling the hostility of a colleague, on the contrary, begin to treat him with emphatic politeness, respect and benevolence. Such people can be very vulnerable internally and your indifference can be interpreted as neglect. If they see that you treat them well, then their hatred will also pass.

Try not to give a reason and not become a target for an unfriendly attitude towards yourself. Do not participate in intrigues, do not enter any groups and do not spread gossip. Conscientiously and efficiently fulfill your own, without shifting it onto the shoulders of others. Be polite to everyone, behave evenly and affably towards everyone. Sane and adequate people simply will not experience anger and other negative emotions towards you.

Identification of ill-wishers

Before you start fighting ill-wishers, you need to identify them. After all, it often happens that they are in the circle of relatives and friends. At the same time, when they say unpleasant things, it is especially difficult to hear them. If the remarks of loved ones suppress a person, if after them they give up, then you need to face the truth and admit that these people are really ill-wishers.

However, no matter how hard it is, it is worth considering: what if they are still right? In this case, it is necessary to think about what real obstacle can stand in the way of the goal and think about how it can be overcome. The right solution is almost always found.

Often you can hurt a person very badly by inspiring him with your negative thoughts. In this case, you need to replace them with your own positive beliefs.

How to turn an enemy into an ally

Since ill-wishers have always been and will always be, you should learn to simply ignore them. They cannot harm the person who has them. If the negative comes from close people who cannot be ignored, it is better to lure them to your side. You can simply agree with their statements and ask for help. Every person is pleased when his opinion is listened to. Most likely, he will gladly come to the rescue and soon turn into an ally.

You can pretty much ruin someone's life by using only jokes and ridicule. In order to disarm a mocker, sometimes it is enough to laugh with him.

Sometimes it happens that people simply misunderstand the actions and deeds of others, then their biased attitude can be caused by the lack of accurate information. You just need to enlighten them about your actions and intentions. If this is done in a tactful, polite way, a person's opinion can change, and he will change his attitude.

If, however, it is not possible to convince a negatively minded colleague or acquaintance, there is no need to quarrel, swear with him, and, moreover, go on to insults. You just need to go to the goal, not paying attention to it.

Unfortunately, there are ill-wishers in everyone's life. But this is only one of the many obstacles to achieving the goal. And, like any obstacle, you need to boldly overcome it. Any, even the most violent ill-wisher, if desired, can be defeated or turned into an ally.

Tip 3: How to behave to put the boss in his place

Sometimes managers use their official powers in the wrong way and descend to outright rudeness towards the employee. It is important to remain calm and remember that to endure humiliation from the boss in your labor obligations Excluded.

Melee weapons against temper

This, of course, is not about weapons specifically. Your calmness will be your main attribute in the fight against the arbitrariness of the leader.

Typically, these leaders are energy vampires. For their own satisfaction, they need you to lose your temper. Don't let these people feed on your emotions, keep them to yourself.

If your boss raises his voice at you, politely ask him to change his tone. Say something along the lines of: “I understand the situation is critical, but could you please follow the chain of command. Your high position does not give you the right to raise your voice at me. Besides, I will understand your demands much sooner if we discuss the problem calmly and in a businesslike manner.”

Some managers humiliate the employee by loudly (for the whole office) calling him to his office by his last name. Go to the head and also calmly notify that you have a first and middle name. The exception is the presence in one firm of people with the same names and patronymics, but such cases are rare. And in order to call to your office, there is a telephone and electronic form connections.

An organized manager is obliged to schedule a meeting with an employee on any issue in advance and notify him of this at least 5 minutes before the conversation. In emergency cases, there is a secretary to call the employee. If you yourself hold the position of secretary, do not be afraid to ask the manager to wait two minutes so that you have time to mentally and documentarily prepare.

Human factor

Leaders are people too. And they also have emotional breakdowns due to fatigue or domestic problems.

Try to relate to increased emotionality in a human way and politely note that you understand everything and know how to sympathize, but work is still a different level of relationships, and you should not transfer domestic problems to work.

Sexual harassment at work

Often, managers use their influence to persuade an employee they like to intimate connection.

As soon as you feel the unhealthy interest of management, firmly indicate the immediate cessation of such actions, otherwise you will be forced to contact the police.

Labor Code to help

If it seems to you that the employer infringes on your labor rights, do not be too lazy to re-read at your leisure Labor Code RF. Write down or print out the norms that apply to your situation. Use your knowledge and refer to the laws during the conversation with the manager.

Claim your job description or a copy thereof. Let it always be at your fingertips in order to avoid misunderstandings when the manager tries to dump other people's responsibilities on you.

Your employer cannot force you to write a letter of resignation own will or threaten to deprive the bonus, if there are no legal grounds for this.

Do not be afraid to use a voice recorder or video recording in case of threats and illegal actions of the boss.

Remember that in labor disputes, the employee has the upper hand as legally weak side.