Why do kind people become cruel? Why did people become cruel and callous? Why are people so cruel? Why do kind people become cruel? Why are there so many cruel people?

I
hate school! I wake up every day and try to find some
an excuse not to go there. Most I spend years on sick leave,
I constantly catch colds, it seems to me, because I hate it so much
school.

And it's all about my classmates. It all started two years ago
ago, when I moved to a specialized English school. If
If only my mother knew!.. And then it began: on the first of September I came
on the ruler, and the first boy from my class who saw me
shouted: “Look, there’s a bespectacled elephant coming!” I even
I didn’t immediately realize that he was talking about me. I used to have a lot of problems
wasn’t, I knew, of course, that I wouldn’t make a fashion model, but
I've never been particularly worried about my weight. And then right away
I felt so ugly! I almost cried, but controlled myself.

The girls in the class didn’t accept me either, they started talking to me
only one girl Katya. And the boys already started in the first lesson
throw paper balls at me and call me names in every possible way. Well
Did I do this to them? Then the teacher called me to the board and called
my last name, but it’s not very sonorous, to put it mildly: Kolbasnikova.
What happened here, everyone was just dying of laughter! And right behind me
and the nickname Fat Sausage stuck.

I tried to talk to the class teacher.
But she said that I was already a big girl to complain. My
Mom thinks so too, and the main thing for her is that she arranged for me
to a prestigious school and that I will receive a good education. How can I
to get it when I’m sitting in class and afraid that I’ll be called to the board,
and everyone will start shouting: “Fat Sausage to the board!” Study
I've become much worse than at my previous school, I just don't care
what grade will I get? I mark every day on the calendar, I wait,
when Saturday comes and you don't have to go to school and hear again
all these cruel words.

And recently I discovered that I have gained even more weight.
Probably because I come home angry and tired - I open
refrigerator and eat, for example, three whole cutlets. Or chocolate.
And I can’t stop, I eat everything I find. Mom has already become
hide products from me! And at school they started teasing me even stronger,
and even the teachers don’t stand up for me.

I do not know what to do. There's still time left until the end of school
two whole years, how can I survive them? I don't even have anyone to talk to
we have a heart-to-heart talk, we don’t see our friends from the old school, my mother doesn’t want to
listen to nothing about my problems in class. If I do finish
school, then I will definitely become a psychologist. And I will help the same
girls who are bullied and called names. But while I'm dreading Monday,
because I know that I will have to go to school again...

Ksenia".

Psychologist Olga Ilyina comments on the situation:

How much, Oksana, I need to tell you. And everything first
queue. Therefore, reading in order, know: EVERYTHING IS IMPORTANT.

BE SURE to show this article to your mom to find out what
what is really important to her is: the prestige of the school and the fact that her daughter is there
studying, or your psychological comfort and NORMAL SELF-ESTEEM.

I hope that you are still important to your mother. It's just, apparently
she didn't have time to STOP and REALIZE that you really
Badly. What even the most cannot best school to be good for you
if for two years not only students, but also teachers DO NOT SEE
OR WASH AWAY your problem. (By the way, information for your
moms: if there is a person in the class who is meant to be the goat
absolution, then this speaks of a great pedagogical (!) problem.)

In this case, it is best to transfer you to another (better
old school, if there were friends there. And you can learn anywhere, it was
wish.

I called you by a different name for a reason, try it
and you call yourself differently. After all, Ksenia means “stranger.”
But Oksana is a completely different song. Open any book, especially
Ukrainian: whatever Oksana does, kindness and become. But becoming is not
only beauty, but also relief forms.

Hence the following: do gymnastics. You need to develop
flexibility. Also, if possible, go to oriental dancing
or belly dancing. In this case, you will not only feel good
your body, but you will also improve your work gastrointestinal tract, but it became
Maybe your metabolism will speed up and you will gradually lose weight.

In the meantime, the court and the case, imagine that you are transparent
glass, and all the nasty things addressed to Ksenia pass by, like
through the glass, without touching you: after all, you are not only transparent, but
and they are not addressing you: after all, you have a different name.

And let mom not forget that she needs to change schools: it’s important
not only get a secondary education, but also feel
capable of more.

And the last thing: work on your body not to spite your enemies,
but for myself beloved. Improve yourself. You have something to strive for.

Main reasons

Historical cruelty

People used to be kinder. It's worth thinking about. And before - when? Millennia ago, when cannibalism flourished? Well, these people can, by and large, even be justified somehow. They were primitive. And they didn’t know at all about humane treatment of one’s neighbor. Or maybe those who lived during the era of the Inquisition were kinder? Or during the reign of Stalin? Many people were in prison thanks to denunciations. How many of these “good-natured people” sincerely tried to present their neighbor with a “gift”!

Relationships with family

Yes, because relatives are not going anywhere. When communicating with strangers, a person restrains himself. There are many reasons: the desire to win over the interlocutor, and the fear of losing an interesting friend. In the case of a boss, intemperance can lead to dismissal. But when you get into the circle of relatives, especially in bad mood, even one word can make a person angry. That’s when a scandal breaks out out of nowhere. Of course, this is fundamentally wrong, but the accumulated negativity requires discharge. That’s why it spills out on those closest to us. They, even if you greatly offend them and quarrel with them, love them so much that they will still forgive.

Root of Evil

Instability in society

An indirect cause of cruelty is growing anxiety. Social inequality and instability give rise to a feeling of discomfort. From TV screens, people again see cruelty. A person whose psyche is formed is able to distinguish the grain from the husk; he will not accept aggression as a call to action. A child will absorb on-screen scenes of violence like a sponge. And he can perceive all this as a kind of school of life. It is important to realize how much such television hurts the child’s psyche, and the answer to the question: “Why did people become cruel?” will be received instantly.

Feelings of rejection

How to defend a victim

diffidence;

It is very important to think through your reaction to the offender. He will perceive you completely differently if the answer is different from his expectations. In some cases, a sense of humor helps. Try not to give in to irritation and direct a complex conflict into a joke. At the same time, learn to perceive unpleasant situations less acutely.

Conclusion

People have become cruel, too cruel. It’s especially scary to watch today’s news: someone was beaten with bats, someone was tortured, someone was shot, a bomb was dropped on someone... We are already literally shaking from cruelty, can it really be even worse? What is happening to our world? Why do people become angry and cruel? And how, in the end, can we stop this orgy of pain, horror and despair?

Why are some people kind and some cruel?
Why exactly modern people became especially cruel?
Why good people become violent? Under what circumstances does this happen?
How to stop cruelty in the world? How to change the world for the better?

When the world it starts to seem wrong and people are too cruel - it signal. It’s not about sulking, locking yourself in your apartment, being afraid of everyone around you, being offended or angry. No! This is a signal to action. This is a signal that it is worth changing the world so that it becomes better, kinder, more welcoming. But we should remember that the world does not change when we yell at each other or hand out leaflets calling “thou shalt not kill!” at the nearest intersection. All this will give absolutely nothing. You can change the world only by bringing changes into it, that is, you have to start with yourself. And it will be difficult, but the desire is not small: to turn the world upside down and make people stop being cruel. This road can only be mastered by those who walk.

Why do we see the world the way we see it?

The most common complaint that can be heard from fighters for kindness and peace throughout the world is that people simply do not see all the threats that they themselves create. People are cruel, evil and don't even think about changing. And we, the kind and good, no matter how much we knock on them, we cannot get through. It is obvious that if everyone saw the world in all the glory of its cruelty, it would be transformed into one continuous kindness. And it seems so to you too, right? Then keep in mind that this is exactly what you think it is.

To get an answer to the question of why people are so cruel, you need to try to see the world through someone else's eyes, try to understand what motivates people.

To see the world as it is, you need to rely on something. In the case of studying inanimate world, it is best to apply knowledge of physics - in this way we learn the forces and laws that we obey. In the case of studying flora, you will have to turn to botany, and in the case of animals - to biology. Of course, when studying a person, you can turn to anatomy and physiology, but this will be a study of only the human body. And in order to understand his essence, you will have to turn to the study of his psyche - system-vector psychology. This latest science for the first time accurately defines human psychotypes through their desires and properties.

It is through system-vector psychology that you can see people as they are. Moreover, one can understand why we ourselves see the world the way we see it, that is, with a slight distortion in our direction. For example, only those with a visual vector feel that the world is filled with cruel people, and they all intentionally do cruel things. It is the spectators who divide the world into good and evil, defining all their most best characteristics, and evil - everything that seems unpleasant to them. So, a visual person cannot kill or injure anyone Living being, therefore, anyone who kicks a dog or kills a chicken is defined by him as a cruel and evil person. At the same time, the viewer himself is very emotional and all people who also have this quality are perceived by him as kind, good people.

Other people see the world differently. For example, people with the skin vector divide people according to economic principles and social superiority, in relation to time and quantity. Through their crack, they also see only a piece of the world and, as a result, do not suffer at all from the fact that people have become cruel, but they are very worried that they have less income than others, that they cannot afford to buy a house, a car and a yacht. This is how they evaluate the world, this is how they speak. A skin-loving person will never say, “How cruel people are.”

And so in each vector, in each person there is his own piece of the world, his own crack into which he peeks.

This is why we make mistakes. Not every emotional person- good and kind. Not every rich person is a thief. And so on.

Why do people become cruel?

But even learning to see vectors and human life values, we unfortunately discovered that the world does not sparkle with positivity. There is a lot of violence in the world, people have really become violent. Information about war and horror settled into everyday news and became commonplace.

Through system-vector psychology we have the opportunity to see real reasons such behavior of people.

When we go beyond ourselves, many things become obvious. People have become so cruel not because they are evil or want harm, but because they suffer. They do not receive additional happiness, they cannot find something that would bring pleasure. Of course, they rush around in search - and pray in churches, and change jobs, and go to success training, and try to get direction from horoscopes and fortune-tellers, but everything is in vain.

It's like having a bad tooth. It hurts and there is nowhere to escape from this pain, even if you climb the wall. Where to run, what to do? We drink analgin, and the pain goes away, for a while. This is not relief, not joy, but... a temporary lull, when you know that the pain will definitely return. Moreover, the same medicine, one tablet, will not help - you will have to increase the dose to dull the pain.

It’s the same here: people suffer, and in order to suffer less, they let off steam. Where? In other people: violence, crime, cruelty. Even just having a fight and shouting makes us feel a little better. But this relief is akin to an analgesic - the short-term analgesic effect will pass very quickly and the suffering will come back with more greater strength. And even the kindest among us become cruel too. Those who just yesterday could not kill a fly are today shouting about the possibility of dropping an atomic bomb on those who interfere with their lives.

How to change the world - how to make people stop being cruel?

It is impossible to take away painkillers from a person with a bad tooth - he will hate you. In the same way, it is impossible to take away from a suffering person the only opportunity to let off steam: to get angry, offended, scream, wear out, or just quietly hate everyone.

The only thing we can do is it's to become happy yourself and become an example for others. Show that you can live differently - differently, without suffering. Just like with a bad tooth - after all, everyone goes to the dentist for a reason, but because doctors can really help and the toothache will really go away. So here too - you need to feel happiness in yourself. Of course, in no case is any kind of self-deception or affirmation, prayer or conspiracy implied when we wind ourselves up, forcefully smile and affirm “I am the most happy man in the world,” and inside there is emptiness, melancholy and depression.

No, it happens differently. We become happy only when we begin to truly understand ourselves, the reasons for our behavior, and find answers to our internal questions. When in response to the internal question “stop, why am I doing this? Where am I going? Am I living right?” There are not some abstractions, but precise, definite answers. All this comes when we begin to understand the world as a whole, understand the actions of people, the reasons for their behavior.

And it is precisely those painful “points” that disturb us that are guidelines where we need to make an effort. If it seems that there is too little good around, then our own visual vector feels suffering and it is necessary to find a way to fill it. If it sounds like no one understands you, then you should ask yourself the question - who do you understand? If it seems that there is a lack of justice, it means that we are already suffocating from the injustice that we ourselves create. If there are only thieves around, you need to take control of yourself and stop thinking,

Every day, continuous negativity of various sizes penetrates into our lives. The media helpfully report who killed, robbed, and ran over whom. Constantly various sources of information bring to our attention information about new disasters and political unrest. And the positive news, compared to the amount of negative news, is negligible. It seems that there is absolutely no kindness and goodness left in the world. Unfortunately, this stream has so “clogged” people’s heads that today no one even thinks about why people are so cruel? How can I change this? And is modern humanity really so soulless?

Main reasons

Why are there so many cruel people? The answer to this question should be sought in the causes of aggression. It should be noted that the manifestation of cruelty has many faces. However, it is not difficult to identify her. A person who causes pain to another, forcing him to suffer, whether morally or physically, is fully aware of this and seeks to cause harm - cruel.

Psychologists identify three reasons why people are cruel:

Dissatisfaction with life. People who are dissatisfied with their fate are quite often exposed to stress and depression. These emotions overwhelm their souls so much that they are ready to break free at any moment. That is why all the negativity is often spilled out by mothers on their children. Some people, out of anger, break tree branches and beat animals. This state of mind quite dangerous, since it threatens the owner with the occurrence of neuroses and mental disorders. In addition to all this, constant negativity seriously shortens life expectancy and leads to the development of heart disease or skin problems.
Indifference. Very often this is what gives rise to unjustified cruelty. Some people don't even try to understand how much pain their actions, and sometimes words, can cause. They don't think about how much they can hurt someone else. At the same time, the object of their cruelty becomes a weak creature who cannot show emotions and explain what pain they caused him.
Suppressed emotions. Sometimes a person shows aggression “on the side.” This behavior is typical of those who in everyday life are forced to constantly hide and suppress desires, emotions, and impulses. Most often, such cruelty is characteristic of grown-up children (especially boys) who grew up in a family of authoritarian parents. Employees who are forced to unquestioningly carry out the orders of their boss, without being able to express their will, in some conditions can show extremely cruel ruthlessness.

Historical cruelty

Older generation loves to wonder - why did so many cruel people appear? Everyone was kinder before. Listening to their complaints, you involuntarily agree. You just have to open a newspaper or watch the news.

Earlier people are worth thinking about. And before - when? Millennia ago, when cannibalism flourished? Well, these people can, by and large, even be justified somehow. They were primitive. And they didn’t know at all about humane treatment of one’s neighbor. Or maybe those who lived during the era of the Inquisition were kinder? Or during the reign of Stalin? Many people were in prison thanks to denunciations. How many of these “good-natured people” sincerely tried to present their neighbor with a “gift”!

Why does it feel like there are so many cruel people today? Of course, the media made their contribution. In the era of democracy, they pay more attention to manifestations of cruelty. It should be noted that the level of humanity among humanity has increased, which is why aggression is so striking.

Relationships with family

All people tend to be cruel. For some this happens very rarely. Others show aggression quite often. At the same time, anyone can commit a cruel act, and quite often such outbursts occur in truly kind people. Unfortunately, all the negativity spills out on those closest to us. For those who are truly loved and very dear. Why are people so cruel? What makes them “take out” their anger on their relatives, and restrain their outbursts of anger with those around them? Why can’t you control your behavior when communicating with loved ones?

Yes, because relatives When communicating with strangers, a person restrains himself. There are many reasons: the desire to win over the interlocutor, and the fear of losing an interesting friend. In the case of a boss, intemperance can lead to dismissal. But when you find yourself in a circle of relatives, especially in a bad mood, even one word can make a person angry. That’s when a scandal breaks out out of nowhere. Of course, this is fundamentally wrong, but the accumulated negativity requires discharge. That’s why it spills out on those closest to us. They, even if you greatly offend them and quarrel with them, love them so much that they will still forgive.

Root of Evil

The feeling of anger is given by nature. It is necessary in order to mobilize all forces for the fight in dangerous moments. But how it will be used by a person depends on the moral standards instilled in childhood. If parents show aggression towards their child, it will definitely come back to haunt them. Relationships between children and fathers based on fear are likely to be adopted by the adolescent in his interactions with peers. It is in the family that one should look for the root of evil. This kind of upbringing clearly explains why people become cruel.

Although in this situation the child may develop another model of behavior: he decides that he is bad and is to blame for everything. Such a teenager becomes a victim ill-treatment peers. Often he does not even look for methods of protection, believing that he deserves this.

Sometimes the cause of aggression may not be violence at all, but overprotection. This method of education puts a feeling of permissiveness into the child’s subconscious. The teenager considers himself the most important and demands unquestioning obedience. Unfortunately, a person who was not taught by his parents to respect others will not gain this wisdom anywhere else. He won't even notice how he humiliates you.

Instability in society

An indirect cause of cruelty is growing anxiety. instability creates a feeling of discomfort. From TV screens, people again see cruelty. A person whose psyche is formed is able to distinguish the grain from the husk; he will not accept aggression as a call to action. A child will absorb on-screen scenes of violence like a sponge. And he can perceive all this as a kind of school of life. It is important to realize how much such television hurts the child’s psyche, and the answer to the question: “Why did people become cruel?” will be received instantly.

Feelings of rejection

It is especially developed in adolescence. However, many adults carry these feelings into adulthood. Quite often you can observe a picture when a child exclaims loudly on the street and points his finger at a person with a different skin color or who has a physical disability.

Adults react completely differently. On a subconscious level, they experience a sense of danger. Immediately there is a desire to withdraw. But for some it manifests itself in cruelty and violence. It is this feeling that sometimes makes teenagers bully peers who are different from them. Why are people so cruel? Again, the instilled skills of tolerance and respect in the family will not allow a teenager or adult to behave this way.

How to defend a victim

Psychologists say that in a group it is quite easy to determine which people are cruel and who is a “lamb.” Therefore, it is recommended to identify a victim of aggression by the following signs:

diffidence;
full acceptance of the view that trouble is deserved.

You should start with awareness of your “I”. Every person has a number of advantages and disadvantages. He is what he is. And no one has the right to offend him. Only by fully accepting this truth can you move further along the path of raising self-esteem and developing a sense of success. Parents can help the child in this awareness. For an adult, since the pattern of behavior is ingrained, it is better to use the help of a professional psychologist.

As a rule, being interested in some new activity helps a lot. You can even enroll in a martial arts section.

It is very important to think through your reaction to the offender. He will perceive you completely differently if the answer is different from his expectations. In some cases it helps. Try not to succumb to irritation and direct a complex conflict into a joke. At the same time, learn to perceive unpleasant situations less acutely.

How to deal with your own aggression?

The reasons described above give an idea of why kind people become cruel. But how to deal with such manifestations? What to do if you start to boil internally?

Perfectly clears away negativity physical exercise. After all, sport teaches conscious control over your emotions and body. Psychologists often recommend mastering breathing exercises. It will allow you to control both body and spirit.

Find a safe outlet for accumulated negativity. Release your emotions with a scream. Just not on your family or your colleague. Shout where it's needed. For example, become an ardent football fan or attend rock concerts.

By the way, psychologists recommend this technique: stand near railway In the evening. When the train passes, scream as loud as you can, as loud as you can. The noise of the wheels will drown out any sound. No one will hear you, but your body will receive the necessary release.

Conclusion

Remember that only you can cope with the feeling of cruelty that arises inside you. And this is completely within your power. If you want to find the answer to the question “why are people so cruel”, start with yourself. Analyze your behavior. Get rid of the toxic feeling, because sooner or later it threatens to develop into severe depression.

Throughout our lives, at least once we have met a person who, in our opinion, was cruel, angry and decidedly disgusting to us.

If your past is anything like other people's, you've probably been teased, gossiped about, yelled at, humiliated, cornered, intimidated, and unfairly punished - and your reaction was probably: " FOR WHAT?"

Why are people angry with each other? Why do some people even like to be bitchy and toxic? You, like most people, will answer something like “... because they are bad people”, “… because they are psychopaths/sociopaths”, “… they are evil”, “… well, that’s how they are, what can you do!”

Yes, such answers are quite normal and common, however, this view of things is very narrow. These answers are naive, and it’s time to better understand why “bad people are bad.”

Why do we like to be offended?

You are talking to someone, you said something frankly offensive, and your interlocutor is offended by you. He stands up threateningly and says: “You know, I learned something about you. You are a real bastard and you don't care about anyone but yourself. No wonder you have almost no friends." And then it quickly washes off.

What is your reaction?

Full righteous anger, you can jump up and start refuting all attacks by striking back. Well, or you will continue to sit, thinking about what you said, while sadness and melancholy slowly devour you. “How could he do this to me?”, “What the hell have I done?” You can continue to stew in your hatred, cursing everything around you.

These two reactions are quite common, and I have behaved similarly in the past. Responding to another person's anger violates our peace of mind... but you know what I'll tell you? We like to be outraged. We like to be drunk with anger.

When we feel unjustly offended, we immediately reward ourselves with the title of “victim”, and not only that, we also experience a sense of superiority. How often in the past have you been angry at a “disgusting person” with the firm belief that “I am much better.” I think, often. But don't worry, this is normal. We all do it.

The fact is that anger is like a drug, and not only because it gives us a false feeling that we are supposedly better, more beautiful, more correct, more just. In addition to this, it creates the illusion of separation between us and the world (in other words, it strengthens our ego). Because of this, we cannot see through the veil of misbehavior because of our unwillingness to let go of anger.

Once we are completely willing to let go of our anger and all its delights, we can truly understand why people are so bad. This awareness will be of endless benefit to you.

How to tear off the mask of feigned cruelty?

When we blame bad and cruel people for all mortal sins, we deprive them of all human qualities. Yes, you will say that there are psychopaths and sociopaths who have no empathy or remorse at all. But these people (who by the way make up a very low percentage of the population) are not robots either. In fact, they also suffer from feelings of loneliness, resentment, disappointment, depression, and this explains a lot. Psychopaths can even show empathy when they want to.

I am convinced that not all “bad” people we meet are necessarily psychopaths or sociopaths, but in fact they are deeply wounded. And we don’t have time to understand their feelings because they disgust us (and because, let’s face it, we ourselves have been deeply hurt).

We spew out excuses like “So what? We are all sufferers, but this is not an excuse at all,” and thereby we strengthen our confidence in our rightness and continue to torment ourselves.

However, if you want to take responsibility for yourself, your life and your happiness, you need to remember one thing:

All cruel, angry, rude people are like that because they are in pain.

If you want to look behind the veil of this show of cruelty, you need to understand “what hurts.” You may have to delve into his past, talk to friends and colleagues to find out why he behaves this way. Well, or just guess.

No matter which approach you take, you're sure to learn something surprising: their behavior is driven by pain.

Perhaps it is family quarrels, problems at work, a breakup or divorce, tragedy or something more vague like depression, fear of failure, fear of rejection, low self-esteem, experiences when a person cannot cope with this pain, he directs it on others. And thus the pain is equalized, multiplying.

But you have the power to interrupt this circle of pain and prevent it from interfering with your thoughts, feelings, and life. The most important thing is to learn to see all these mechanisms in your own head and, as a result, to truly understand a person.

The next time someone treats you badly, take your time. Feel everything negative emotions, and then release them. Ask yourself, “What pain is this person experiencing that makes him do this?” Then open yourself to forgiveness and understanding, because all the mental patterns that led to such behavior on his part are or were in you. AND the only reason, why you may not have them - this is either an ideal childhood and growing up or

Main reasons

Psychologists identify three reasons why people are cruel:

Dissatisfaction with life. People who are dissatisfied with their fate are quite often exposed to stress and depression. These emotions overwhelm their souls so much that they are ready to break free at any moment. That is why all the negativity is often spilled out by mothers on their children. Some people, out of anger, break tree branches and beat animals. This mental state is quite dangerous, since it threatens the owner with the occurrence of neuroses and mental disorders. In addition to all this, constant negativity seriously shortens life expectancy and leads to the development of heart disease or skin problems.
Indifference. Very often it is this that gives rise to unjustified cruelty. Some people don't even try to understand how much pain their actions, and sometimes words, can cause. They don't think about how much they can hurt someone else. At the same time, the object of their cruelty becomes a weak creature who cannot show emotions and explain what pain they caused him.
Suppressed emotions. Sometimes a person shows aggression “on the side.” This behavior is typical of those who in everyday life are forced to constantly hide and suppress desires, emotions, and impulses. Most often, such cruelty is characteristic of grown-up children (especially boys) who grew up in a family of authoritarian parents. Employees who are forced to unquestioningly carry out the orders of their boss, without being able to express their will, in some conditions can show extremely cruel ruthlessness.

Historical cruelty

The older generation likes to wonder why so many cruel people appeared? Everyone was kinder before. Listening to their complaints, you involuntarily agree. You just have to open a newspaper or watch the news.

Relationships with family

Root of Evil

Although in this situation the child may develop another model of behavior: he decides that he is bad and is to blame for everything. Such a teenager becomes a victim of cruel treatment by peers. Often he does not even look for methods of protection, believing that he deserves this.

Instability in society

Feelings of rejection

How to defend a victim

Psychologists say that in a group it is quite easy to determine which people are cruel and who is a “lamb.” Therefore, it is recommended to identify a victim of aggression by the following signs:

diffidence;
full acceptance of the view that trouble is deserved.

As a rule, being interested in some new activity helps a lot. You can even enroll in a martial arts section.

How to deal with your own aggression?

The reasons described above give an idea of why kind people become cruel. But how to deal with such manifestations? What to do if you start to boil internally?

Physical activity perfectly clears away negativity. After all, sport teaches conscious control over your emotions and body. Psychologists often recommend mastering breathing exercises. It will allow you to control both body and spirit.

By the way, psychologists recommend this technique: stand near the railway in the evening. When the train passes, scream as loud as you can, as loud as you can. The noise of the wheels will drown out any sound. No one will hear you, but your body will receive the necessary release.

Conclusion

Human society has been constantly and intensively developing for many centuries. One era gives way to another, progress in all spheres of activity has raised man to the pedestal of the dominant species on planet Earth.

One thing is bad: everything changes on the path of progress, but no one, with all their aspirations, strengths and capabilities, could either ban, overcome or abolish cruelty. This character trait, like many others, manifests itself in different situations, changing a person to unpredictable consequences.

What is cruelty?

Cruelty is selfish selfishness, envy, hatred and malice towards other people, towards life and towards oneself. This is the result of a lack of success in achieving one’s own goals and objectives with intentional or accidental harm to everything around.

It's no secret: what goes around comes around - cruelty begets cruelty. Causing harm to everything around in order to gain benefit for themselves, people do not think about the consequences that will not take long to arrive.

Forms of cruelty

Cruelty has different shapes manifestations: inflicting physical pain on a living being without any pity or compassion, offensive words, all kinds of actions and even inaction, and often unhealthy fantasies. She finds a loophole in straightforwardness and stubbornness, in mockery and deceit, in anger and unfriendliness, in intolerance for the mistakes of others.

The worst thing is when cruelty brings moral or physical pleasure. This is already sadism. Moreover, people, animals, plants, buildings, monuments, transport, places of leisure, etc. suffer from the harmful consequences.

Reasons for cruelty

People are not born cruel. In society there have always been norms of behavior, ethics and morality, on the border of which cruelty lay dormant. Abusive people become abusive for many reasons:

High or low self-esteem. Dissatisfaction with life and yourself.
The concepts of morality and morality have lost their power.
Self-affirmation in a distorted form as a misunderstanding of methods of self-preservation.
Childhood fears that persisted through adult life among people faced with indifference, cruel punishments and strict regime education in childhood.
Demonstration of one's greatness and power through humiliating, mocking words, oppression and suppression, violence, murder. Sadism is the highest form of cruelty.
Pride and, as a result, a feeling of revenge.
Hiding personal complexes due to inferiority and weakness.
Manifestation of inhumanity in inaction, taking pleasure in it, deliberate refusal to help.

Acceptable Cruelty

To better understand what cruelty is, we need to consider it as a reaction to intolerable circumstances that threaten human existence. And the more fierce they are, the more the response will go off scale.

The psychology of cruelty is a fine line on which good and evil are balanced. Is it possible to be a harmless, sympathetic, compliant person for everyone if you are faced with meanness, injustice, humiliation and insults? I think no. But the cruel are feared, shunned, and sometimes even respected.

A tough person is a strong personality. Kindness cannot be opposed to cruelty if human life depends on it. Therefore, cruelty should be developed not for violence, but in order to resist it.

Why do cruel people exist? Man by nature is a predator. If you look back at the whole history, you can’t count the wars with the most brutal destruction of all living things. Therefore, in any developed society, laws are necessary, the violation of which is fraught with severe punishment. Cruelty is an integral part of life, which means you need to learn to live and fight with it, and look for new models of behavior.

Examples of cruelty in everyday life

Every person has at least once asked what is also cruelty, examples of which are found all the time. All media are simply replete with reports of outrages and violence. Television, radio, the press, the Internet, fiction and scientific literature, history textbooks - everywhere you can encounter examples of cruelty.

Any historical social system, kings, serfdom, wars, repressions - everything is permeated with cruelty. The cult of cruelty in religions, sacrifice, aggression, intimidation, abuse of power, sky-high crime rates and impunity, terrorism are also cruelty.

IN family life examples of cruelty include suppression of will, energy vampirism, creation of obstacles in the realization of intellectual, creative and professional opportunities, all kinds of prohibitions in planning offspring, budget, leisure, etc.

And, of course, cruelty to animals is an abyss from which it is impossible to get out. If a person is capable of offending a dumb creature, then it is difficult to call him a person.

What is cruelty in the children's world

Very often, cruelty manifests itself in children who are out of control. Child cruelty is primarily associated with unfavorable family relationships. Lack of respect between family members and frequent quarrels in the presence of children reduce the level of trust in parents, which results in anger and aggression in the child.

Attention, care, patience, and frankness will help protect children from cruelty. A personal role model is very important. The absence of cruelty on the part of parents towards children and people around them will raise respect in the family to the proper level. Seeing and appreciating a child’s personality, taking his opinions and interests into account, trying to see the world through his eyes is the key to success in the age-old problem of fathers and children.

How to overcome cruelty?

Knowing and understanding what cruelty is, you can take certain measures to protect yourself from it. Among them are simple methods and work on yourself:

If you realize that cruelty is evil, then this is the first step towards solving the issue of getting rid of it.
It is necessary to love yourself, people and the whole world around you, thereby getting rid of internal fears.
You need to give to the world what you yourself want to receive: mercy, compassion, kindness.
Increasing self-esteem, the desire for success, and social recognition is one of the effective ways to combat cruelty.
Limiting your social circle. Surrounded by kind and decent people, the world becomes cleaner.

Thus, cruelty is caused by both external and internal factors that are ingrained in a person from childhood. We talked not only about our own ability to be cruel, but also about the very attitude of other people to such manifestations. Therefore, it is necessary to fight and prevent this character trait from childhood, instilling in the child kindness and mercy towards the people around him.

Throughout our lives, at least once we have met a person who, in our opinion, was cruel, angry and decidedly disgusting to us.

Yes, such answers are quite normal and common, however, this view of things is very narrow. These answers are naive, and it’s time to better understand why “bad people are bad.”

Why do we like to be offended?

What is your reaction?

Full of righteous anger, you can jump up and begin to rebut all attacks, striking back. Well, or you will continue to sit, thinking about what you said, while sadness and melancholy slowly devour you. “How could he do this to me?”, “What the hell have I done?” You can continue to stew in your hatred, cursing everything around you.

These two reactions are quite common, and I have behaved similarly in the past. Responding to another person's anger disturbs our peace of mind... but you know what I tell you? We like to be outraged. We like to be drunk with anger.

Once we are completely willing to let go of our anger and all its delights, we can truly understand why people are so bad. This awareness will be of endless benefit to you.

How to tear off the mask of feigned cruelty?

We spew out excuses like “So what? We are all sufferers, but this is not an excuse at all,” and thereby we strengthen our confidence in our rightness and continue to torment ourselves.

However, if you want to take responsibility for yourself, your life and your happiness, you need to remember one thing:

All cruel, angry, rude people are like that because they are in pain.

No matter which approach you take, you're sure to learn something surprising: their behavior is driven by pain.

The next time someone treats you badly, take your time. Feel all the negative emotions and then let them go. Ask yourself, “What pain is this person experiencing that makes him do this?” Then open yourself to forgiveness and understanding, because all the mental patterns that led to such behavior on his part are or were in you. And the only reason why you may not have them is either an ideal childhood and growing up or

The world today has become greedy. In other words, this concept can be defined as commercialism, love of money, greed for material wealth, and self-interest. What does greed mean? This is an irrepressible craving for money or material wealth, and often they are strangers. As a feeling, this phenomenon can be seen in many life examples.

In religion, greed is considered one of the deadly sins. A greedy person always carries anger towards others, does not trust anyone and avoids deep relationships. This leads to loneliness, where a person may be surrounded by people, but he will understand that he cannot be open to anyone.

Greed pushes people to do many things that they may later regret. Often various crimes (thefts, robberies, beatings, etc.) are committed on the basis of greed for material wealth. Modern people create families based on the love of money. They are friends with each other because they want access.

Of course, it’s interesting why people have become so angry and cruel; you might think they were different before. There is a paradox: people always think that modernity is going to hell, but in the past, yes, it was good there, not like now. Rubbish, not time... And people partially or completely correspond to the time. But still, let’s try to consider why people are so bad, and whether this is true.

It is important to understand that the categories of “good” and “evil” are usually relative. Of course, there are absolutely horrific acts that are equally condemned by Muslims, Christians and atheists. But now it’s not about that, but about the norm. If we take, for example, murder, then, on the one hand, it is evil, and on the other hand, when a terrorist or maniac is eliminated, then it is not such an evil, from the point of view of an ordinary person.

Or another example. Now debates about the legality of euthanasia as a phenomenon are ongoing. Some shout that a person should die with dignity, even if he is in pain.

Main reasons

Why are there so many cruel people? The answer to this question should be sought in the causes of aggression. It should be noted that the manifestation of cruelty has many faces. However, it is not difficult to identify her. A person who causes pain to another, causing them to suffer, whether mentally or physically, is fully aware of it and intends to cause harm.

The greed of people is the love of money, acquisitiveness, greed, in other words, it is an immoderate desire to receive Money or other material benefits. In Catholic theology, human greed is considered one of the main flaws, fundamental vices, mortal sins, since it leads to an increase in troubles and worries, internal bitterness, and unsociability. In addition, the described vice tirelessly provokes fear of loss and anger.

The word greed is associated with greed (covetousness), which is condemned by all peoples. Often this sin serves as a motive for committing a serious illegal act or is the cause of a tragedy.

Feeling of greed

Acquisitiveness or greed is a vice that consists in a person’s lack of control over by one's own desire receive material benefits. At the same time, as these same benefits accumulate, a feeling of satisfaction does not appear; on the contrary, greed becomes more and more inflamed.

Humanity has come up with 7 deadly sins. Greed is one of them. What is this feeling? Many people confuse greed with greed. It's very close, but not there yet. Many argue that this is selfishness. Well, greed includes this quality. The article will tell you what greed means, give examples and consider the problem of this phenomenon.

What is Greed?

What is Greed? You may notice that many people act based on the intention of getting something. It’s good when a person receives money or any other material benefits. All people need material goods, which is natural in the world of market economic relations. However, for some people this desire is excessive. Nothing interests them more than the material side of any issue, where they will receive some reward (preferably in monetary terms). This is called greed.

Why are people greedy? Greed gives rise to evil in people, which is why greed is called one of the most unpleasant manifestations in Christianity: anger, greed and crime are born from greed. Why do you need to follow the 10 commandments? Only an insatiable greed for knowledge and doing good deeds is justified, and everything else is discussed below in the article.

Why are people greedy?

Greed is most often understood as specific personal data:

desire to have and spend more money to myself; lack of desire to lose your wealth; the desire for accumulation and acquisitiveness.

Sometimes, a completely non-greedy person may exhibit actions that are associated with greed, for example, an unwillingness to spend money on himself or his loved ones - this may be caused by a financial situation or a number of circumstances.

Greed has existed at all times - this is a natural quality of character, since material wealth has always determined the level of existence and life.

Concepts of happiness in this world

What is greed? Why are we silent, don’t you really know what greed is? ... Yes, an insatiable desire for the fruits of material labor, greed. What is the reason for this? What is the reason? The main reason for greed is why? No. What is the main reason for greed? I told you in lectures. This reason is the nature of the soul, what nature, what type of nature, eh? Yes. The soul has such strength, it wants to be happy, and this desire is limitless, it has no end. Therefore, a person who sees his happiness in material things, i.e. he believes that the more objects and things he has at home, the more money he has, the happier he will be, then this is greed. I see, right?

Greed denotes our original state: we want to be happy. Therefore, can a person be accused of being greedy? Just as we can blame each other for not doing what we need to do here at all.

Why are modern people so heartless and cruel? Over the past few years, people have become callous and less tolerant.

This conclusion was reached by the National Social Research Service after analyzing the results of a large-scale survey about relationships between people and the changing social climate in the UK. And this is not the only country where attitudes towards the poor have noticeably worsened.

Every second Briton today believes that the country's social policy is too soft and benefits are too large.

One in four people are convinced that people experience financial difficulties only because they are lazy and slow. Since 1983, when statisticians first conducted such a study, the number of those who believe that the government cares too much about the unemployed and poor has almost doubled - to 54%.

People have become cruel, too cruel. It’s especially scary to watch today’s news: someone was beaten with bats, someone was tortured, someone was shot, someone had a bomb dropped on someone... We are already literally shaking from cruelty, can it really be even worse? What is happening to our world? Why do people become angry and cruel? And how, in the end, can we stop this orgy of pain, horror and despair?

Why are some people kind and some cruel?
Why have modern people become especially cruel?
Why do kind people become cruel? Under what circumstances does this happen?
How to stop cruelty in the world? How to change the world for the better?

When the world around you begins to seem wrong, and people are too cruel, this is a signal. It’s not about sulking, locking yourself in your apartment, being afraid of everyone around you, being offended or angry. No! This is a signal to action. This is a signal that it is worth changing the world so that it becomes better, kinder.

A sage and a disciple are sitting at the gates of their city. A traveler comes up and asks:

What kind of people live in this city?
-Who lives where you came from? - asks the sage.
- Oh, scoundrels and thieves, evil and depraved...
“It’s the same here,” answered the sage.

After some time, another traveler came up and also asked what kind of people were in this city.
-Who lives where you came from? - asked the sage.
“Wonderful people, kind and sympathetic,” answered the traveler.
“Here you will find the same ones,” said the sage.

Why did you tell one that scoundrels live here, and the other that good people live here? - the student asked the sage.
“There are both good and bad people everywhere,” the sage answered him. -It’s just that everyone finds only what they can do.

Each of us at least once in our lives has encountered the indifference of others. The negative opinion and attitude of another person can be harmful, it can irritate and even infuriate, but when it is completely absent, it cannot but be alarming. Nobody wants to deal with aggressive people, but it's hard to deny: they are alive, they have emotions. They can be reassured; their problems, as a rule, can be solved. But how to react to a person whose gaze expresses nothing, who experiences neither pain nor compassion? The answer is quite clear: be afraid of indifferent people.

It would seem, what’s wrong with them? Gray personalities to which even the word “personality” is difficult to apply. Yes, sometimes they are stuffed with knowledge, they can easily retell the plot of a book or movie, have a hobby - in a word, be like other people... But try to talk to them. You will lose interest in what they are saying after the very first phrases, because they will be devoid of a simple human attitude.

if a person does not live for himself, i.e. lives for himself, he will not restrain himself from greed. This is the nature of the soul. Sooner or later, he will want to grab as much money as possible, it’s only a matter of time. If a person lives for himself, and he thinks: I will live modestly, to whom am I doing harm, I good man, nothing bad to anyone, I’m just earning money, I have a salary, that’s all, it’s only a matter of time before he becomes greedy. This is the nature of the soul, it is infinite in nature, it cannot stop there. Today is one thing, tomorrow is another. Therefore, there will be no happiness in this, the family lives in peace, it just calmly earns as much as it should, and that’s it, no problems.

A moment comes, and you will all now remember your lives, for someone, for many people, this happened, the family lives calmly, does not bother anyone, lives for itself, earns money honestly, a moment comes, and all this happiness collapses due to greed.

Once a day, continuous negativity of various scales seeps into our lives. The media helpfully report who killed, robbed, and ran over whom. All the time different sources information brings to our attention information about new disasters and political unrest. And there is not much positive news compared to the amount of negative news. A memory is created that there is no good or bad left in the world. Unfortunately, this stream has “clogged” people’s heads so much that now no one even thinks about why people are so merciless? How can I change this? Is the modern population of the earth really so soulless?

Main prerequisites

Why are there so many bitter people? The answer to this question should be found in the reasons for the appearance of anger. It should be seen that the manifestation of ruthlessness has quite many faces. Despite all this, it is easy to identify her. A person who causes pain to another, forcing him to suffer, not fundamentally, morally or physically, is one hundred percent aware of this and seeks to cause harm - is cruel.

Psychologists identify three reasons why people are bitter:

Dissatisfaction with life. People who are dissatisfied with their own fate are often subject to stress and depression. These emotions overwhelm their souls so much that they are ready to break free at any moment. That is why mothers often spill out all the negativity on their children. Some people, out of anger, break tree branches and beat animals. This spiritual state is quite unsafe, as it threatens the owner with the appearance of neuroses and psychological disorders. Apart from all this, constant negativity seriously shortens life expectancy and leads to the development of heart disease or skin problems.
Indifference. Very often it specifically gives rise to unjustified ruthlessness. Some people don’t even try to realize how much pain their actions, and sometimes words, can cause. They don't think how much they can hurt someone else. With all this, the object of their mercilessness becomes a weak creature who cannot show emotions and explain what pain they caused him.
Suppressed emotions. From time to time a person shows anger “on the side”. This behavior is typical of those who in daily life are obliged to constantly hide and suppress desires, emotions, and impulses. In most cases, such ruthlessness is characteristic of grown-up children (especially boys) who grew up in a family of authoritarian parents. Employees who are obliged to unconditionally follow the orders of their boss, without the ability to express their will, can, under certain conditions, show very brutal cruelty.

Historical ruthlessness

The older generation likes to wonder why so many bitter people appeared? Before, everyone was kinder. Listening to their complaints, you involuntarily agree. You just have to open the newspaper or look at the announcements.

Previously, people were kinder. It's worth thinking about. And earlier - when? Millennia ago, when cannibalism flourished? Well, these people can actually be justified somehow. They were primitive. And they didn’t know at all about humane attitude towards one’s neighbor. Or maybe those who lived during the era of the Inquisition were kinder? Or during the reign of Stalin? Great amount people were in jail thanks to denunciations. How many such “good-natured people” tried with all their hearts to give their neighbors a “gift”!

Why does one feel that there are so many bitter people now? Naturally, the media contributed. In the era of democracy, they pay more attention to manifestations of ruthlessness. It must be emphasized that the level of humanity among the world's population has increased, which is why anger is so visible.

Things to do with family

All people tend to be merciless. For some this happens very rarely. Others often show anger. With all this, anyone can commit a cruel act, and quite often such outbursts actually happen. good people. Unfortunately, all the negativity spills out on the closest relatives and friends. For those who in reality are loved and very dear. Why are people so merciless? What forces them to “take out” their anger on their relatives, and to restrain outbursts of anger with those around them? Why is it not possible to control your behavior when talking with loved ones?

Yes, because the relatives are not going anywhere. When communicating with strangers, a person restrains himself. There are many circumstances: the desire to win over the interlocutor, and the fear of losing an exciting friend. In the case of a boss, intemperance can threaten dismissal. But when you find yourself in a circle of relatives, especially in a bad mood, even one word can make a person angry. It was then that a scandal broke out out of nowhere. Naturally, this is fundamentally incorrect, but the accumulated negativity requires release. That’s why it spills out on those closest to us. Even if you really offend them and quarrel with them, they adore you so much that they will still forgive you.

Root of Evil

The feeling of anger is given by nature. It is needed in order to mobilize all forces to fight in unsafe moments. But how it will be applied by a person depends on the moral standards instilled in childhood. If parents show anger towards a child, it will certainly come back to haunt them. Relationships between children and fathers based on horror are likely to be adopted by the child in conversations with peers. It is in the family that the root of evil should be found. This kind of education clearly explains why people become bitter.

Although in this situation the child may develop a different model of behavior: he decides that he is bad and will blame everything. Such a child becomes a victim of the fierce appeal of his peers. Often he does not even look for ways to defend himself, believing that he deserves the same.

From time to time, the precondition for anger may not be violence at all, but overprotection. This method of education introduces a sense of permissiveness into the child’s subconscious. The child considers himself to be the most important and asks for unconditional submission. Unfortunately, a person who was not taught by his parents to respect others will not gain this wisdom anywhere else. He won't even see how he will humiliate you.

Impermanence in society

An indirect prerequisite for ruthlessness is growing anxiety. Social inequality and instability give rise to a feeling of discomfort. From TV screens, people again see ruthlessness. A person whose psyche is formed is able to distinguish the grain from the husk; he will not perceive anger as a call to action. A child will absorb on-screen scenes of violence like a sponge. And he can perceive all this as some kind of school of life. It is important to understand how similar television hurts the child’s psyche, and the answer to the question: “Why have people become bitter?” will be received instantly.

Feelings of rejection

It is especially developed in adolescence. But many adults carry these feelings into adulthood. Quite often you can see a picture when a child loudly exclaims on the street and points his finger at a person with a different skin color or who has a physical disability.

Adults react completely differently. On a subconscious level, they feel a sense of threat. This is where the desire to withdraw from oneself appears. But for some it manifests itself in mercilessness and violence. It is this feeling that sometimes forces teenagers to mock peers who are different from them. Why are people so merciless? Again, the instilled abilities of tolerance and respect in the family will not allow a child or an adult to behave this way.

How to defend a victim

Psychologists say that in a team it is quite easy to find out which people are merciless and who is a “lamb”. Therefore, it is recommended to identify the victim of anger by the following signs:

low self-esteem;
self-doubt;
full acceptance of the idea that problems are deserved.

You should start with understanding your own “I”. Every person has a number of advantages and disadvantages. He is what he is. And no one has the right to offend him. Only by fully accepting this truth can you move further along the path of raising self-esteem and developing a sense of luck. The child’s ancestors can help him understand this. For an adult, since the pattern of behavior has become ingrained, it is better to use the help of a professional psychologist.

Usually, being passionate about something new helps a lot. You can even enroll in a martial arts section.

It is very important to think about the reaction to the offender. He will accept you completely differently if the answer is good from his expectations. In some cases, a sense of humor helps. Try not to succumb to irritation and turn a difficult conflict into a joke. With all this, learn to accept the least acutely unpleasant situations.

How to fight your anger?

The premises described above provide insight into why kind people become bitter. But how to deal with such manifestations? What to do if you start to boil internally?

Physical activity is a great way to clear away negativity. After all, sport teaches conscious control over your feelings and body. Psychologists often advise mastering breathing exercises. It will allow you to control both body and spirit.

Find a safe outlet for accumulated negativity. Release your emotions with a click. Just not on your family or your employee. Yell where necessary. For example, become a specific football fan or attend rock concerts.

By the way, psychologists recommend this technique: stand near a steel road in the evening. When the train passes, scream as loud as you can, as loud as you can. The noise of the wheels will drown out any sound. No one will hear you, but the body will receive the necessary release.

Conclusion

Remember that only you can cope with the feeling of mercilessness that appears inside you. And you can do this completely. If you want to find the answer to the question “why are people so merciless,” start with yourself. Analyze your behavior. Get rid of the toxic feeling, because at some point it threatens to grow into severe depression.

The harsh truth is that inhuman cruelty is characteristic only of humans. Not a single animal can compare with humans in the power of manifestations of hatred towards their own kind. Why are people so angry?

Every day we are confronted with examples of horrific cruelty in the media. Beatings, murders, massacres, torture...

A guy killed a girl because she laughed at him in company. 122 blows were found on the victim's body. The examination found that the first blow was fatal. A psychiatric examination showed the culprit's sanity.

Where does this inhuman cruelty come from?!

Man is an animal

Laureate Nobel Prize German animal psychologist Konrad Lorenz, impressed by the horrors of the Second World War, decided to find out the nature of human aggression. As a zoologist and devotee evolutionary theory, he decided to start by researching the nature of aggression in animals. Lorenz found that all animals have mechanisms of hostile behavior towards members of their species, that is, innate intraspecific aggression, which, as he proves, ultimately serves to preserve the species.

Intraspecific aggression performs a number of important biological functions:

distribution of living space so that the animal finds food for itself; the animal protects its territory, aggression stops as soon as the boundaries are restored;

sexual selection: only the strongest male gets the right to leave his offspring; in mating fights, the weak one is usually not finished off, but driven away;

protection of offspring from the encroachment of strangers and one’s own; parents drive away but do not kill intruders;

hierarchical function - determines the system of power and subordination in the community, the weak obeys the strong;

the function of partnership is coordinated manifestations of aggression, for example, to expel a relative or a stranger;

feeding function - built into species that live in places poor in food resources (for example, Balkhash perch eats its own young).

It is believed that the main forms of intraspecific aggression are competitive and territorial aggression, as well as aggression caused by fear and irritation.

Are animals kinder than people?

However, after analyzing the behavior of more than 50 species, Konrad Lorenz noticed that animals that have natural weapons in their arsenal in the form of huge horns, deadly fangs, strong hooves, strong beaks, etc., in the process of evolution, developed behavioral analogues of morality. This is a prohibition at the level of instinct to use one’s natural weapons against an animal of one’s own species, especially when the defeated one demonstrates submission.

That is, there is built into the aggressive behavior of animals automatic system stops, which instantly triggers certain types of postures that indicate dependence and defeat. As soon as a wolf, in a fierce fight for a female, exposes the jugular vein in the neck, the second wolf only slightly squeezes its mouth, but never bites through completely. In a deer battle, as soon as one deer feels weaker, it becomes sideways, exposing its unprotected abdominal cavity to the enemy. The second deer, even in a fit of combat, only touches the opponent’s stomach with its antlers, stopping at the last second, but not completing the final deadly movement. The stronger the animal’s natural weapons, the more clearly the “stop system” works.

Conversely, weakly armed species of animals do not have instinctive prohibitions on deadly aggression towards their relatives, since the harm caused cannot be significant and the victim always has the opportunity to escape. In captivity, when a defeated enemy has nowhere to run, he is guaranteed to die from a stronger opponent. In any case, as Konrad Lorenz emphasizes, in the animal world intraspecific aggression serves exclusively the purpose of preserving the species.

Lorenz considers humans to be a weakly armed species by nature, therefore not having instinctive prohibitions against causing harm to their own kind. With the invention of weapons (stone, axe, gun), man became the most armed species, but evolutionarily devoid of “natural morality,” and therefore easily kills members of his own species.

There is one nuance here. We humans, unlike animals, have consciousness. This difference hides the root of man’s cruelty to man in comparison with the intraspecific aggression of an animal.

Man is an animal who can never get enough

System-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan suggests that consciousness was formed gradually as a result of the growth of our shortcomings. Animals do not have the same volume of desires as humans, they are completely balanced and in this they are perfect in their own way.

A person always wants more. More than he has, more than he can get, and if he gets it, then more than he can eat. Lack is when “I want, but I can’t get it,” “I want, but I can’t.” This lack provided the opportunity for the development of thought, which became the beginning of a separation from the animal state, the beginning of the development of consciousness.

Hostility as an engine of progress

System-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan argues that man, unlike animals, feels his own uniqueness, separateness from others.

Having experienced hunger for a long time and not being able to fill it (our species was the weakest in the savannah - without claws, teeth, hooves), man for the first time felt his neighbor as an object that could be consumed as food. However, having arisen, this desire was immediately limited. In the delta between the desire to use one’s neighbor into oneself and the limitation on this desire, a feeling of hostility towards another is born.

But that’s not all, once having escaped the limits of animal volume, our desires continue to grow. They double. Today we bought a Cossack, tomorrow we wanted a foreign car, today we bought a foreign car, tomorrow we wanted a Mercedes. On this simple example it is clear that a person is never satisfied with what he receives.

Our ever-growing desire to receive constantly leads to an increase in hostility. Lorenz proved that animals have an intraspecific unconscious coordinated instinct that does not allow intraspecific aggression to destroy the species. For humans, intraspecific hostility still poses a threat to survival - as it is constantly growing. At the same time, it is also an incentive for us to develop. It was in order to limit hostility that we first created the law, then culture and morality.

Why are people so angry? Because they are people!

Man is a lack of pleasure, a desire. Our desires are not satisfied - we immediately feel hostility. Mom didn’t buy ice cream: “Bad mom!” The woman does not meet my expectations: “ Bad woman! I feel bad, I don’t know what I want: “Everyone is bad. The world is cruel and unfair! It is not for nothing that moral and cultural norms are instilled in a child from early childhood. Mutual assistance, sympathy, and empathy for others help us cope with our selfish desires for pleasure.

Today our desires continue to grow, and existing limiters stop working on them. The skin law and visual culture have almost worked themselves out. Today we are rapidly rushing into a future where man is no longer moral (since his desires are too high to be limited by morality and ethics), but is not yet spiritual. Today we are ready to eat anyone, consume the whole world, if only we feel good, real troglodytes - but this does not mean degradation. This is another stage of our growth, the response to which should be the emergence of limiters of a new level.

The path from animal to man

System-vector psychology Yuri Burlan says that in conditions of increased desires and increased hostility, no restrictions on hostility will work anymore. Our coexistence in the future will be built not on prohibitions, but on complete disappearance hostility as such.

In contrast to the awareness of one’s uniqueness and the other as an object for satiating one’s shortcomings, systems thinking gives awareness of the other person as oneself, as well as awareness of the integrity of the human species. This - new level consciousness, much higher than the intraspecific animal unconscious instinct. This is the awareness of oneself as a part of all humanity and the awareness of another person as a part of oneself. And, as a result, the inability to harm another. Just as a person cannot deliberately harm himself, so he will not be able to harm another, because his pain will be felt as if it were his own.

In fact, people are not evil and no worse than animals, people are just not mature enough. We have grown so much mentally that we invented the hadron collider, but we still have not matured to the point of self-awareness. Daily outbursts of aggression, violation of all moral norms at the level of entire states are evidence that the time has come.

And stopping aggression is easier than it seems at first glance. You just need to see the underlying causes of what is happening and eliminate them. Understand that the picture of the world around us with cruelty, murders, crimes is the result of the fact that each of us considers himself the only one and feels only his desires. And for the sake of my “I want” I’m even ready to kill if necessary. But the paradox is that even this will not fill a person with happiness. Neither the one who shows aggression, nor the one against whom it is directed, can actually feel joy, and will be equally unhappy.

This can be corrected by realizing the true desires and capabilities of each of us. By understanding a person’s inner potential and his intentions, we will be able to clearly understand what to expect from our environment and how to most adequately express ourselves among others. When we deeply understand another person and the motives for his actions from the inside, we do not become victims of unexpected aggression, because people's actions become easily predictable and predictable. Moreover, we can consciously choose our environment in which we will feel comfortable and safe. It would be ideal if every person in the world could do this and everyone would be happy, but even if this is still far away, it’s worth starting with yourself.

You can register for free online lectures on System-Vector Psychology by Yuri Burlan using the link:

The article was written based on training materials “ System-vector psychology»

IN Lately It is very difficult for me to understand what is happening to people around me. Have we changed that much, or has the world changed that much? Is this why we have become so cruel, so sharp in our words towards each other? Where does cruelty in people come from?

Why are people so cruel and evil

It would seem that we are fighting for the best and at the same moment we do not know how to do it with dignity. We do not know how to do something good without thereby offending the people around us. Many people have so much anger, pride and envy deep down in their souls that it simply overwhelms them. The most important thing is that those who are most dissatisfied with something most often have all the qualities that they condemn in others.

We don't pay attention to ourselves, we only see other people's shortcomings and problems. And it makes me so happy when something doesn’t work out for someone. If we were smarter, we would not rejoice at other people’s problems, but would try to help solve them for those who need it. And if you have a smart and clear head, then you will not emphasize and focus on the fact that someone failed.

Is it really so difficult to be just a person? Deal with your problems, rejoice in your achievements, help those who need it. Is it really necessary to judge someone, and generally stick your nose into other people’s affairs? Why is human nature like this? Why are we always more interested in other people's affairs than our own? We have no right to judge anyone, because there is no absolute truth, no standard or ideal.

Why are there so many cruel people

Because being dissatisfied, complaining and complaining is always easier than doing something to correct the situation, achieve goals, make your life better. Yes, there will always be those who will be dissatisfied with something, there’s simply no way around it, but are there really so few people left who can think with their own minds and evaluate the situation objectively? If so, then just put yourself in the place of this or that person, and, as they say, be in his shoes. Then you will see how everything looks from the other side.

Greetings, dear readers! Do you know what percentage of the probability is that you will die a natural death, and not from the cruelty of society? I'm sure you're immediately imagining violence and murder right now. But I will disappoint you, ruthlessness and heartlessness also lead to such sad consequences.

The more rapidly a society develops, the more it moves away from its nature and becomes more vulnerable. On the one hand, humanity has become tolerant and humane, on the other, the statistics of cruelty in various crimes is off the charts.

Why does a person become cruel? Where does this trait come from in us and is it possible to escape from it? If you are concerned about the safety of yourself and your loved ones, read this article to the end. This will be the minimum you can do for the well-being of the entire society.

Atrocity is about people

Lately we often hear that animals are kinder than people. That a person sometimes behaves like an animal. Cruel, arrogant, dirty, shameless. But I don’t agree with this comparison; it is, at the very least, offensive for animals. And the concept of cruelty is generally applicable only to humans.

Animals do not have a higher intelligence; they live their lives only on their natural instincts. We are used to thinking that if they kill their own kind, then they are ruthless and heartless. But they are not endowed with such feelings by nature, unlike humans.

Cruelty is a character trait that is manifested by a merciless, aggressive attitude towards all living beings, with the purpose of causing pain and suffering to them. Not only a person, but also any animal or plant can become a victim.

Who is this cruel person? This is an individual who makes cruelty his way of life. Such a person can easily insult, humiliate, hit or even kill. His demands are inadequate, and if they are not fulfilled, merciless punishment follows, sometimes even physical. He simply does not realize that such behavior is unacceptable. There is no pity or compassion in him. And it’s good if such feelings are simply absent; it’s scary when other people’s suffering gives pleasure.

Inaction can also cause harm

Cruelty comes in two forms. Active and passive. If in the first option everything is clear, the individual takes some action, then in the second it is much more interesting.

At passive form the person is inactive. For example, when a crowd beats one, a dog attacks someone, or a person drowns.

Of course there may be more here. But it’s much sadder if a person soullessly passes by, not trying to help and still gloating.

Inhumanity is manifested through:

Verbal aggression
Causing physical pain, violence
Killing a person, animal or even plant
Vandalism
Acts “out of spite”
Anger and hatred of others, eternal blaming them for all problems
Failure to provide help to those who need it

Reasons for cruelty

A healthy, adequate person will never understand how you can cause pain to others and get pleasure from it. For this reason, we have it in our heads that all murderers, rapists and maniacs are mentally ill people.

In fact, only some of them will actually be mental disorder. Those accused of a crime always undergo a psychiatric evaluation before they are sentenced. The type of punishment depends on it, it will be a prison term or compulsory treatment. Therefore, it should be assumed that the mental healthy man, capable of consciously showing cruelty.

Sometimes it happens that people are specifically looking for a way to become ruthless and cruel. Basically, these are those who have already encountered such an attitude towards themselves and believe that the only way to survive is to go to the dark side. This is the first reason why people become cruel.

A person is faced with a merciless attitude towards himself and considers this the solution to all his problems. There is disappointment in people and there is a desire to show everyone their “thick skin.”
Also, when a person accepts such behavior as truth, it is usually children. If a child sees cruelty in his parents, then one should not expect kindness and sympathy from him in adulthood. Character is programmed through childhood. Children do not yet know what is good and bad. For them, everything their parents do is right. Also, children under overprotection may imagine themselves as “kings” and demand the unquestioning submission of everyone else.
causes anger and aggression. When a person is not happy with his fate, he begins to look for those responsible. This is in the ideal case, he comes to the understanding that he is the architect of his own happiness, but usually everything is not so rosy. Bad government, noisy neighbor, stupid boss, bitch wife, mediocrity children. In such a situation, is it possible to love someone? I don't think so. If you are constantly depressed, you hate everyone, and it also seems that they hate you, then of course you will either go crazy or become a maniac.
Mental illnesses. You can be born with such a sore, or you can acquire it. Neurological diseases or certain negative events in life can lead to such consequences.

We lived better before

The older generation likes to complain and say that young people are cruel now. That good is losing and the dark side is filling the world. At first, of course, I want to agree, but if we turn to history, then questions arise for the ancestors.

When were they kinder? When was cannibalism present? Or perhaps the Inquisition was held in high esteem? Or perhaps during the reign of Stalin, when denunciation was considered a duty? I’m already silent about fascism. After all, it did not originate in our days.

Previously, we simply didn’t think about why a person becomes cruel. There were other problems. I would like to note that now people, on the contrary, have become more humane, because of this, cruelty is very striking.

The media and the weakening of censorship play a huge role in life. News reports are constantly full of scary headlines. Turn on the TV, change channels and you will definitely come across at least one that shows cruelty.

Because of this, we also develop an addiction to cruelty. Learning every day that someone was killed somewhere, in the end every person at least once in his life will say, “They killed, they killed, what can you do. Life is like that."

Difficult economic situation, worsening relations between states, information war, substitution of concepts, mistakes in education, and not only of parents, public education not ideal either. All this affects the mood of society, the weather in the house and relationships between people.

A person who is too kind is dangerous to himself

Sometimes a person who behaves unfriendly and cruel seems to us immediately sick. But it is not he who is sick, but his system of values and thoughts.

Practice shows that not everyone who tortured animals in childhood becomes killers, but all killers did it. After all, technically it will not be difficult to insult, hit or even kill a person, but morally it is very difficult to do this.

But there are people with very kind souls and sometimes they wonder how to become cruel, cold-blooded and insensitive.

Most often, this is necessary so that they simply stop using them. Sometimes excessive morality and conscience causes suffering to a person. He cannot refuse, he has to ignore his desires and needs.

Also, excessive pity for everyone can drive you crazy. Constantly putting oneself in the place of another, feeling sorry for everyone and experiencing other people’s negative emotions, prevents a person from learning to defend himself. Aggression is one of the components of the instinct of self-preservation.

Is it possible to cultivate cruelty in yourself? I think it is possible, but it is better not to do it. I recommend watching a film based on this topic. real events Stanford Prison Experiment. "The Experiment" by Paul Scheuring. On a voluntary basis, 26 people were locked in the prison, half of them played the role of prisoners, the other half of guards.

Regardless of whether you are a cruel person or a merciful one, you need to work with your emotions and spiritual development. You need to be able to negotiate with yourself.